Your problems answered
My traumatic childhood is 影響する／感情ing our 関係I’m 19, my fianc? is 22, and we have a young child. We used to have a loving 関係 but there have always been problems because I have a traumatic past (I have had counselling). There are so many 支配するs that my fianc? has to obey to keep me feeling 安全な and 井戸／弁護士席. I am timid and need him to look after me. I have seen him looking at prettier girls but he tells me it’s all in my 長，率いる. He now 非難するs me for everything and is 扱う／治療するing me 不正に. He has 約束d to change but he hasn’t. Our sex life used to be good, but since I 認める that I am not orgasmic it has seemed pointless. I would like another baby but he says that if I get 妊娠している I will have to have an abortion or it’s over. As a result I have started to resent sex. I want to leave him but I can’t because I love him and I can’t 生き残る on my own. Can our 関係 be saved?
Maybe, but it would mean continuing to work on the 損失 done to you as a child 同様に as the 関係. You need to feel 安全な・保証する enough within yourself to let go of those 支配するs and stop seeing your fianc? as your 安全 一面に覆う／毛布. It’s 罰金 for him to be emotionally supportive, but it should be 相互の. He should not be 扱う／治療するing you 不正に. If he felt that いっそう少なく was 需要・要求するd of him and that you had more inner strength, perhaps he could be more loving. If the 関係 were to 改善する, then sex could be good again. You need the 関係 to be strong before having another baby. Please 接触する the Rethink helpline on 020 8974 6814, which helps people with mental health problems ? you will find them very understanding.
He met another woman on the web
I recently discovered that yet again my husband has met another woman 経由で the internet. The same thing happened seven years ago ? he left but returned after three months. I have told him I could not go through this again. We have told our 12-year-old daughter that we are separating. He has said he is 90 per cent sure he will not go to this other woman. But twice this week I have heard him on the phone to her. He tells me he will never find anyone better than me, so why do t his?
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Maybe he thought he could have an 事件／事情／状勢 and not be caught out. Or that if he left and it didn’t work out, you would have him 支援する again. The fact that you have told him the 関係 is over has made him think twice, so suddenly she does not seem やめる so attractive. Frequently men who have serial 事件／事情／状勢s love the chase and the conquest, but when the excitement wears off they 急ぐ 支援する to their wives, begging forgiveness. In their way they may love their wives, but their own selfish 願望（する）s take 優先 time and time again.
I can’t 対処する with my mum’s drink problem ?
My mum can’t 収容する／認める that she has a drink problem. My dad left her because of it. I am 18 and it’s 廃虚ing our 関係. It 影響する／感情d my GCSEs and I am so emotionally drained that 改正 was difficult for the A-levels I have just done. During the day she is lovely, but after one glass of ワイン she becomes hurtful and hysterical. Even when she 減ずるs me to 涙／ほころびs she seems 完全に indifferent.
Try talking to your mother when she hasn’t been drinking and explain just how painful it is when she says unkind things. Do you have a の近くに 親族 who could encourage her to get help from アル中患者s 匿名の／不明の? I hope your school wrote to the A-level 診察するing board explaining the 状況／情勢. Her drinking is not your fault and you have to say to yourself, ‘That is her life, this is 地雷.’ Go to college, see your friends and do things that you enjoy. You can love your mother but you are not 責任がある her and only she can stop the drinking. 接触する Al-Anon on 020 7403 0888, which 申し込む／申し出s fantastic support to families of problem drinkers.
I’ve just 設立する out he has another family
When I met my partner two years ago he said he was 離婚d with two teenage sons. We now have a beautiful baby . Recently I discovered an old profile of his on Friends 再会させるd, which 明言する／公表するd that he had been married twice and had a five-year-old child. When I 直面するd him, he 否定するd that it was him. His sister 辞退するd to tell me anything but 結局 認める it was true but that he had no 接触する with his ex-wife or child. She made me 約束 not to tell my partner that she had told me. Should I tell him that I know and 疎遠にする his family? ?
Neither break his sister’s 信用／信任 nor collude with him and pretend that you don’t know the truth. Get as much （警察などへの）密告，告訴（状） as possible, such as where and when he was married (ask his sister), then 接触する the General 登録（する） Office 証明書 Services Section on 0845 603 7788 (gro.gov.uk). Once you have 証拠, you can 直面する him with it. He 借りがあるs you an 陳謝 and an explanation, and needs to 受託する that if he wants a 未来 with you it can’t be based on lies.??
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Illustration: ツバメ Welch
