MAUREEN CALLAHAN: It's the Me-Me Markle 小旅行する! Why DIDN'T Meghan find time to について言及する 癌-攻撃する，衝突する Kate まっただ中に all her self-promo peacocking in Nigeria?
How's that for a 非，不，無-王室の 王室の 小旅行する?
A whiplash 72-hour visit to Nigeria saw Harry and Meghan as if on 公式の／役人 商売／仕事 ― as though they were still working 王室のs, 圧力（をかける）ing the flesh in 追跡 of soft 力／強力にする.
I'm sorry: Wasn't Megxit spurred, in no small part, by their 願望（する） to 避ける such 儀式の drudgeries? By what the Gruesome Twosome 明確に saw as the pointlessness of 外交の photo ops, 略章-cuttings, speeches given in 淡褐色 rooms to little 影響?
'I can't believe I'm not getting paid for this.'
That was Meghan Markle during her 公式の／役人 2018 王室の 小旅行する of Australia, as 報告（する）／憶測d by Valentine Low in his 調書をとる／予約する 'Courtiers: The Hidden 力／強力にする Behind the 栄冠を与える.'
'Although she enjoyed the attention', Low wrote, 'Meghan failed to understand the point of all those walkabouts, shaking 手渡すs with countless strangers.'
Walkabouts are looking pretty good 権利 about now, aren't they?
A whiplash 72-hour visit to Nigeria saw Harry and Meghan as if on 公式の／役人 商売／仕事 ― as though they were still working 王室のs , 圧力（をかける）ing the flesh in 追跡 of soft 力／強力にする.
'I can't believe I'm not getting paid for this.' That was Meghan Markle during her 公式の／役人 2018 王室の 小旅行する of Australia (above), as 報告（する）／憶測d by Valentine Low in his 調書をとる／予約する 'Courtiers: The Hidden 力／強力にする Behind the 栄冠を与える.'?
Capping a week in which Meghan was absent from the Met 祝祭 ― 同様に as a 私的な, 星／主役にする-studded party thrown by her Montecito neighbor Gwyneth Paltrow (more on that in a bit) ― 加える Harry's trip to 促進する the Invictus Games in the UK, Meghan alighted in Nigeria, her self-布告するd 'motherland', to sing her own 賞賛するs.
Yes: That's 正確に／まさに what one should call a foreign nation when one's husband, a prince of the 血, has just been seemingly shunned by his father the King, and his entire family, in his actual 母国.
A country that Meghan has not stepped foot in since the Queen's death ― aside from the VIP lounge at Heathrow, where she 迎える／歓迎するd her husband en 大勝する to Africa.
But hey ― Meghan's 43 パーセント Nigerian, によれば her self-報告（する）／憶測ing, which in her mind makes her Nigeria's 'people's princess,' I guess.
After calling Nigeria 'my country' ― ever subtle ― Meghan lavished 賞賛する upon herself under the guise of complimenting her host nation.
Of course, no individual 引用する was 直接／まっすぐに 特記する／引用するd. Perhaps she's learned from her 'Lion King'/Mandela debacle.
Instead, we get groupthink in the ether.
Here was Meghan co-hosting a Women in Leadership event, bringing it all 支援する to herself:
'What has been echoed so much in the past day is, "Oh, we are so not surprised when we 設立する out you are Nigerian." It is a compliment to you, because what they define as a Nigerian woman is 勇敢に立ち向かう, resilient, 勇敢な, beautiful.'
Just when you think Markle's del usions of grandeur have reached 頂点（に達する） de-lu-lu.
Day One saw Meghan and Harry speaking to students at a mental health 首脳会議.
Because when we think of emotional 安定, proportionate 返答s, and a general healthy, 楽観的な 見通し on life, who の中で us doesn't think of the Sussexes?
After calling Nigeria 'my country' ― ever subtle ― Meghan lavished 賞賛する upon herself under the guise of complimenting her host nation.?
Meghan 申し込む／申し出d up her typical garlanded vagaries, California ぱらぱら雨s that mean nothing.
'You know, every 選び出す／独身 one of you has a story', she told students at the Lightway 学院. 'We all have our story.'
No kidding.
'And there's no shame in any 選び出す／独身 one of your stories,' she blathered on. 'Even on the hardest days or the darkest days, everything is a 中心存在 of your strength by each of you 存在 there.'
Huh? 存在 where, 正確に／まさに?
She should team up with Kamala Harris for a Grand Word Sala d 小旅行する of 2024.
Next （機の）カム a story about Harry and Meghan's daughter Lili, who is not yet three.
'A few weeks ago,' Meghan told the students, 'she looked at me and saw her reflection in my 注目する，もくろむs. She said, "Mama, I see myself in you."'
Ah, the Zen of 王室の toddlers. Princess Lilibet knows what's up: 断言する Mommy's greatness at all costs. 押し進める through that 限られた／立憲的な vocabulary to 賞賛する and 支払う／賃金 尊敬の印.
Now, this quick trip, undertaken for the ostensible 目的 of 促進するing Invictus (which Harry just 促進するd in Britain), meant that Meghan was away from her children on Mother's Day.
No 事柄.
Meghan 申し込む／申し出d up her typical garlanded vagaries, California ぱらぱら雨s that mean noth ing. 'You know, every 選び出す／独身 one of you has a story,' she told students at the Lightway 学院 (above). 'We all have our story.'
Students wait to welcome the Sussexes to the Wuse Lightway 学院 in Abuja today
'It feels appropriate,' Meghan said, 'that although we, of course, are 行方不明の our children, I'm 行方不明の my babies, it feels very appropriate to be in the motherland and amongst family.'
If that isn't a 非難する in the 直面する to King Charles, who was too 'busy' to see his younger son, and to Prince William and Kate Middleton, who have all understandably kept a 会社／堅い distance ― 井戸／弁護士席, what is?
Charles and Kate, of course, are fighting their own 癌 戦う／戦いs. Yet hardly not a word of 親切 from Meghan まっただ中に her in-法律s' own 'hardest days or darkest days,' not a nod to 'everything' 存在 'a 中心存在' of their 'strength'.
But remember everyone, as Meghan always says: Be 肉親，親類d!
支援する to Meghan's reply during her Socratic excha nge with Lili.
'I thought: Yes, I do see me in you, and you see me in you,' Meghan told the students. 'But as I look around this room, I see myself in all of you 同様に.'
Vintage Markle: Me, me, me, me, me. Have I told you about me?
It calls to mind, all too painfully, her 受託 speech at the Ms. 創立／基礎 Awards last year, which I 記録，記録的な／記録するd as a service to humanity.
Never forget: Markle entered the ballroom through a 賃貸しの car office. That's our Duchess of Hertz.
'Ms.', Meghan said in her 受託 speech, 'was formative in [my] cocooning. It piqued my curiosity, and it became the chrysalis for the woman that I would become and that I am today.'
平等に unhinged was Harry reviewing Nigerian 軍隊／機動隊s, standing at attention, as if he hadn't been stripped of his 公式の／役人 軍の 肩書を与えるs upon stepping 負かす／撃墜する. As if King Charles hadn't 公式に 指名するd William 陸軍大佐-in-長，指導者 of the Army 空気／公表する 軍団 ― Harry's old 部隊, and a 肩書を与える he would さもなければ have been given ― on the very day Harry spoke at St. Paul's last week.
And for all the 支配するs Harry makes about needing taxpayer-基金d 安全 in the UK: These two multimillionaires 利益d from 政府-基金d 安全 in Nigeria, にもかかわらず 87 million Nigerians living below the poverty line.
平等に unhinged was Harry reviewing Nigerian 軍隊／機動隊s (above, on May 10), standing at attention, as if he hadn't been stripped of his 公式の／役人 軍の 肩書を与えるs upon stepping 負かす／撃墜する.?
'I though t: "Yes, I do see me in you, and you see me in you,"' Meghan told the students. 'But as I look around this room, I see myself in all of you 同様に.' Vintage Markle: Me, me, me, me, me. Have I told you about me??
But Harry and Meghan are icons of social 司法（官）, of 公正，普通株主権 and fairness everywhere.
It's theater of the absurd at House Sussex, cosplaying as the 王室のs they so さもなければ seem to despise, Meghan swanning about in ill-fitting dresses that 公正に／かなり sweep the 床に打ち倒す.
Can this woman 追加する a stylist, a tailor and maybe a speechwriter to her LinkedIn search?
If only Harry and Meghan could have played the long game. It would have been Meghan 前線-and-中心 at the most glittering events, 生成するing トンs of 好意／親善 stepping in for sick 王室のs. It would have been Meghan 受託するing, say, Tom 巡航する's outstretched 手渡す at the next '最高の，を越す Gun' 首相 or sitting 前線 列／漕ぐ／騒動 at the BAFTAs, wearing the 栄冠を与える jewels.
式のs, it's faux-王室の-with-cheese wherever they'll be 受託するd.
Compare this to an event much closer to Meghan's home: A glamorous, 招待-only outdoor dinner thrown by Gwyneth Paltrow at her Montecito 広い地所, celebrating a 共同 between Goop and the Italian 高級な brand Loro Piana.
Per a Vogue 派遣（する） just before the Met 祝祭, Gwyneth's guest 名簿（に載せる）／表（にあげる） 含むd Oprah Winfrey and Ted Sarandos, 長，率いる of Netflix.
Maybe Meghan's 招待する got lost in the mail?
Think about it: Meghan's new lifestyle brand, American Riviera Orchard, is a pale, content-いっそう少なく imitation of Gwyneth's Goop.
It's theater of the absurd at House Sussex, cosplaying as the 王室のs they so さもなければ seem to despise, Meghan swanning about in ill-fitting dresses that 公正に／かなり sweep the 床に打ち倒す.?
Meghan so wants to be Gwyneth, messy buns and sun-kissed California glamour, all mixed with aphoristic, merchandisable self-help.
The kicker? Gwyneth isn't even likable! But she's a success nonetheless.
If only Meghan could square that circle. How 失望させるing that must be for her.
As for Oprah? 井戸／弁護士席, she's kept her distance ever since Meghan leveled those '王室の 人種差別主義者' （人命などを）奪う，主張するs ? the same ones Harry backtracked last year.
Netflix's Sarandos 効果的に cancelled Harry and Meghan's reality docuseries 取引，協定 but has greenlit a 疑わしい cooking show, hosted by La Markle. ぎこちない cocktail hour chatter, that.
And American Vogue, which has yet to give Meghan a cover, 問題／発行するd that glowing 報告（する）／憶測 from Gwyneth's 星／主役にする-studded event, throwing A++++ shade all the way.
Calling Gwyneth's dinner party 'a 公式文書，認める-perfect evening outdoors surrounded by lemon trees' ― ahem ― the magazine 公式文書，認めるd that the meal was in 'keeping with Montecito's 評判 as the American Riveria.'
Ha!
If Meghan sent Gwyneth one of her 限られた／立憲的な-版 jarred jams, replete with peeling stickers and bruised lemon surrounds ― 井戸／弁護士席, it seems, Vogue was 肉親，親類d enough not to について言及する.
As our 割引 Duchess once said: 'Be 感謝する for the little things.'
