Trinny Woodall says her ex-husband's 自殺 was hard to 受託する because he was 'obsessed' with the 福利事業 of his children and she can't understand why he thought they would be better off without him

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Trinny Woodall has opened up about her ex-husband's 自殺, 説 it was hard to understand how someone so hyper-obsessed with their children's 福利事業 納得させるd himself they were better off without him.

Beauty entrepreneur and former TV presenter Trinny said she didn't get to grieve for Johnny Elichaoff until six months ago - eight years after his death - when their daughter Lyla left home, leaving her alone.

Johnny, who also had a son Zak from a previous 関係, took his life in 2014 老年の 55.?

Although he was known to have 苦しむd a 一連の failed oil 投資s before his death, Trinny said he was going through such 騒動 that he'd 納得させるd himself his children were better off without him - にもかかわらず his hypervigilance over their 福利事業.

The former What Not To Wear presenter, 59, whose Trinny London 商売／仕事 is valued at £180 million, told Monday's Diary of a CEO podcast: 'Johnny had hypervigilance around his children because he had been in the Israeli army and he was a paramedic.

Emotional:?Trinny Woodall has opened up about her ex-husband's 自殺, 説 it was hard to understand how someone so obsessed with their children's 福利事業 would end their life?

破滅的な: Trinny said she didn't get to grieve for Johnny Elichaoff until six months ago - eight years after his death - when their daughter Lyla left home

'And he had from it 地位，任命する-traumatic 強調する／ストレス disorder which wasn't 診断するd until about 20 years later.

'But one of the things also is hypervigilance around his children, so he was always so worried for their 福利事業.

'So you 肉親，親類d of have this thing of where do you get to in your brain, when you are so worried about your children, that you can 納得させる yourself that the best thing for your children, who you love profoundly, is that you're not in their life anymore?

'And that is something that is so important that we can help people who get to that 状況／情勢 - that they don't get to that final part of that 状況／情勢.?

'It's understanding what to recognise, and it's very hard to recognise. I didn't recognise. There were lots of 詳細（に述べる）s of it which could have really upset me, of things that were done wrong. But you 肉親，親類d of have to let go.

'You need to work through these 行う／開催する／段階s and not get stuck in something which eats you up.'?

She 追加するd: 'Every person who has had somebody commit 自殺 will at some 行う／開催する／段階 say "was there anything I could have done to stop it?"'?

Johnny's death （機の）カム after the couple had 離婚d, but Trinny said they remained so の近くに that they would still speak every day until he died - but it took her eight years to grieve.

Hard to 過程:?Trinny said he was going through such 騒動 that he'd 納得させるd himself his children were better off without him - にもかかわらず his hypervigilance over their 福利事業

悲劇の:?Johnny, who also had a son Zak from a previous 関係, took his life in 2014 老年の 55

She said: 'We spoke every day on the phone. It took me a long time to grieve because he left a mess when he died which I had to 肉親，親類d of を取り引きする.

'So it preoccupies you to not then 現実に just think about what you 行方不明になる in somebody. You're 焦点（を合わせる）d on what you've got to do, you go on to 自動車-操縦する.

'Probably oddly I moved in March and that was the first time I remember Lyla went away, and it was the first time in 35 years I'd been on my own in the house. And I grieved for Johnny, all those years later.'?

S he 追加するd: 'I suppose you need space. He died, there was a mess, then starting the 商売／仕事, I was living in a house I couldn't afford to live in, I had to sell it for lots of 推論する／理由s, one of them for that 推論する／理由.

'There were so many sort of 解雇する／砲火／射撃s I was 取引，協定ing with - trying to guide Lyla to be 承認する. So there were a lot of years of that.

Moving: Trinny was の近くに to 涙／ほころびs as she discussed her former husband's death on YouTube podcast Diary of a CEO

?Old times: Trinny with former husband?Johnny Elichaoff at the 保守的な Party 黒人／ボイコット and White Ball at London's Old Billingsgate Market in 2008

'And then another life change of just deciding I want to live on my own then brought up in a way to be able to just feel something that I hadn't really let myself feel.

'いつかs in life we know we're not in that part of that strong enough to feel that feeling and move 今後, and we have to be in the 権利 状況／情勢 and give ourselves that breathing space to be able to feel the fullness of that feeling without 裁判／判断 or 犯罪 of 悔恨.'?

She said what she felt then was "there was nothing better in anyone else than the bestness of Johnny - and I 行方不明になるd it".

'This is eight years later, but things take time,' she 追加するd.?

Johnny, who had 戦う／戦いd an 中毒 to painkillers for 20 years, died at the Whiteley's shopping centre in Bayswater, west London, in November 2014.?

The drummer turned 実業家 had been talked 負かす／撃墜する from the same 位置／汚点／見つけ出す 11 days 以前 and was sectioned 簡潔に.

Proud mother: The TV presenter with the couple's daughter,?Lyla Elichaoff, at the?V&A Summer Party and DIVA 展示 Preview in June?

But he returned to the shopping centre twice more in the space of five days before finally 殺人，大当り himself the next day.?

Johnny married TV presenter Trinny in 1999 in London's Knightsbridge and the couple had a child Lyla, now 19, before they 離婚d in 2009, but remained on good 条件.

An 検死 into his death was 行為／行うd at Westminster 検死官's 法廷，裁判所 in November 2015, during which?Trinny's brother?示す Woodall read a 声明 from the presenter.

She wrote: 'Johnny Elichaoff was a much loved brother, father and husband and he will be sorely 行方不明になるd by all who knew him.

'Even in his darkest moments he was always there for those who needed him as a parent, brother, son and spouse with 無条件の love and support.

'As a person he had the best sense of humour, he was 無条件に 肉親，親類d and never spoke ill of other people.

'He was 深く心に感じた with his advice and had the ability to always make people feel better once they had confided in him

'Everyone who met him had a story to tell about and not a day goes by his family don't think of him and the utter 悲劇 of his passing.'