Dude, Not Cool! 10 Things About 'The Dark Knight' That Aren't So Great

Holy rabid and drooling interweb fanbase Batman! "The Dark Knight!" Dark Knight, Dark Knight! Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yes, the Christopher Nolan directed follow-up to "Batman Begins" is pretty great, it's going to shatter all records, it's giving geeks full-on erections, it's compelling fanboys to rape and bludgeon dissenting critics and their families and it's the greatest thing since God himself invented the Earth, the universe and all good things. Yes! We fucking get it. But 'Dark Knight' is not completely flawless. In the face of all the annoying dorks slobbering over this film, we present 10 things about the Batman film that could use some fixin'. If somehow in Christ you haven't already seen this film six times already, don't read this until you've seen it.

1. Harvey Dent's "Two Face" make-up. There's a reason why super hero movies are usually never that realistic: they have to follow the tropes of the comic book and while they're fine in that fantasy little world, on screen they can look more than a little ridiculous. While Two-Face's make-up job isn't silly per se, it's not exactly realistic either. It doesn't take you exactly out of the picture, but there's a reason why the Corleone family and this film shouldn't be mentioned in the same breath (suggestions otherwise are amateur hour, frankly). As one reader aptly puts it, Two Face's burnt face "breaks the fourth wall of believability." Also, let's face it, Aaron Eckhart kind of loses it and hams it up when he becomes the scarred villain too (though he is solid in the beginning).

2. Christopher Nolan can't direct action for shit. Ok, he's improving, we'll give him that. Nothing could be as dull as the Batmobile car chase in "Batman Begins," but he's no Paul Greengrass, and while it's admirable that he likes to shoot his own action sequences in super dark and clipped sequences (ala Bourne), there are reasons a second unit was invented.

3. IMAX is too much. Only 4 our 5 scenes in Batman (the action sequences) were shot in IMAX, so for aspect-ratio fetishists, that's watching things stretched and blown-out (a purist no-no). Even then, the film is grueling and punishing enough as it is and at 2 1/2 hours, so the IMAX is like a cockpunch to your eyeballs and brain functions. Look what it did to poor Variety scribe Anne Thompson, she had to have herself a lie down afterwards she was so confused.

4. Expository dialogue. Do the bank robbers at the beginning of the film really need to say about the guy who organized the heist, "He calls himself 'The Joker'." Really? C'mon, couldn't that have come up somehow or someone could have called him, "quite the Joker" and the name stuck? It's definitely a small quibble for sure, but it's those types of things that take you out of the zone for a second and remind you this isn't real.

5. False advertising. It's a PG-13 film, but it's kind of psychologically brutalizing. As the New Yorker's David Denby says, "When Ledger wields a knife, he is thoroughly terrifying...do not, despite the PG-13 rating, bring the children." They blow up a hospital? Hello, are you heathens Timothy McVeigh? Batman fucking bitchslaps the Joker for christsakes!

6. Christian Bale's Batman voice. Was it just us or was it the Dark Knight growl and scowl more annoying and more unbelievable this time?


7. Cillian Murphy's cameo. Damn, that was a whole lot of nothing. Hope the dude got paid well.


7.5. The Latin American Mayor of Gotham wears eye shadow? Dear actor Nestor Carbonell, is this some weird method thing we're not quite grasping? Is this supposed to set the stage for his effeminate villain ways in the next film? Is he in an emo band?

8. The dangling chads in the script. Ok, so Batman jumps out a window to save Maggie Gyllenhaal, hey, pretty heroic! He saves her, whew, rad. And what happens to the Joker and his cronies and all those innocent people trapped upstairs at the Harvey Dent fundraiser? Hey, we don't know cause the director cuts to the next scene! Uhh, hello?

9. That annoying score by Hans Zimmer and that other dude. We lied, we can't think of 10 legit reasons. Aside from the tenebrous taut score being awesome in of itself, there's this excellent, buzzing, droning quality to it like an airplane about to crash that's incredibly minimalist, atonal and way out-there for a mainstream film. Steven Reich and Stockhausen would be proud.

10. Heath Ledger's acting. Lick your face much, buddy? Did he just finish eating potato chips? Just kidding!

Louis Leterrier Won't Have Jack To Do With 'Superman Returns' Sequel

A few weeks ago "The Incredible Hulk" director Louis Leterrier was doing some mouth breathing and he sort of suggested that he might have something to do with the next Superman film that DC Comics and Warner Bros. are trying to figure out what to do with next ("Superman Returns" director Bryan Singer appears to still be attached... for now).

Anne Thompson spoke to Legendary Pictures producer Thomas Tull, who goes 50/50 with Warner Bros. (who back DC Comics properties) today. He tells the Variety scribe and blogger that Superman is still a ways off because Singer is still working on "Valkryie" and a script hasn't even been finalized (so much for Brandon Routh saying filming is going to start early 2009, told ya).

"It's an iconic character. After everything that went into the first film, it's important to make sure that nothing is rushed and we come out with a fantastic second film," Tull told Thompson adding that everyone wants a "worthy opponent" for the sequel. He also tells the trade blogger that Leterrier won't be involved in any Superman film. "He's laser-focused on ['Clash of The Titans']."

'Watchmen' Mania Hits The Interweb On The Eve Of ComicCon

The Internet pissed its pants yesterday afternoon. Why? Well, because the fanboys got their first real taste of the heavily-anticipated adaptation of the heralded graphic novel "Watchmen," that's being directed by full-grown fanboy and film director Zack Snyder (the filmmaker behind "300").

We're fans of the graphic novel created by cult comic-book icon Alan Moore, but we read it a few years after the fact and which might be part of the reasonwhy we never considered it as seminal as Frank Miller's "Dark Knight," but it is quite good. Regardless, the trailer, more images hit and interviews started appearing everywhere. While the promotional onslaught attack? Cause Comic-Con the nerd mecca of all things super-hero, sci-fi, fantasy, etc. is next weekend in San Diego (a whale's vagina!).

In the Entertainment Weekly cover story that comes out Friday, Snyder threw down the gauntlet. ''In my movie, Superman doesn't care about humanity, Batman can't get it up, and the bad guy wants world peace.''Will Watchmen be the end of superhero movies? Probably not. But it sure will kick them in the gut.''

And then he pretty much pissed all over the gauntlet and said, "how you like me now? Hot enough for ya?"

"And some of this [super-hero] stuff is hard to take seriously. I mean, The Hulk? Come on.'' Snyder remembers screening some Watchmen footage for an unnamed studio executive. Afterward, Snyder says, the exec turned to him and said, ''This makes Superman look stupid.''

MTV spoke to Snyder and it's interesting to note, they visited the set and basically said without the special effects, people looked kind of retarded ("Billy Crudup was wearing a bizarre getup that made him look like a Smurf hooked up to electrodes"). They said the actors put a lot of faith into the director and the special effects. Snyder says what you've seen is just the beginning. "That [CGI] stuff is, honestly, in the early days still, so it gets better and better every day."

Asked whether the movie would represent the more "quiet and meditative" parts of the Watchmen story, Snyder danced around the answer basically saying no in not so many words. "The truth is, the movie is designed to get pop culture excited. And to me, in the end, it is a very intellectual and moral debate that these characters will have. But that doesn't mean they don't kick each other's asses on the way!"

"Watchmen" is a complex, multi-layered mystery adventure and surely it can't all fit in the film, but that doesn't mean they didn't try. Patrick Wilson who plays Nite Owl in the film recently told the MTV Movies blog that Snyder attempted to shoot the entire graphic novel, but that doesn't necessarily mean it'll make the final cut.

"Zack tried to put everything he could in and he left it to the studio to cut it and tell him what he can’t fit in. For the script we started with, every scene has something different than what’s on the page. That’s the fun of it, building it as you go.”

This fits considering Snyder once said the DVD could be more than 3 1/2 hours long 0r more.

Every couple of months, some magazine dusts off the endlessly quotable Alan Moore, as cantankerous a man as their is (and a practicing magician), and ask him a bunch of easy fishing-with-dynamite questions about "Watchmen" to which he barks out contemptuous answers about his utter disdain for the movie adaptation. EW trolled him out once more just this week (how coincidental!). Moore lives at a moral code not far from Rorscharch and pretty much above every living human being on earth. He detests D.C. Comics, the people that own "Watchmen," and Warner Bros. - the studio producing the film with D.C. - are under strict orders not to contact him. "I don't want anyone who works for DC comic books to contact me ever again, or I'll change my number," he said flatly. Moore has absolutely zero interest in Hollywood and the dude is such a staunch nutjob man of his word you could pretty much bet the farm that that will never ever change.

[Note: for those that have still never seen the HBO drama "The Wire," Jesus, even Alan Moore loves it: "It's the most stunning piece of television that has ever come out of America, possibly the most stunning piece of television full-stop." This is the type of quote you hang above your desk if you're David Simon.]

ComicCon is right around the corner, but Moore wouldn't rightly touch that nerd ground zero with a thousand foot pole. "I find it a bit overwhelming and creepy."

Rope of Silicon has done an amazing side by side comparison with the trailer and the comics that illustrates Snyder's almost pathological attention to detail. This sort of shit goes a long way with fans and it's admittedly quite impressive.

We kind of dissed the trailer yesterday, but we will admit the special effects do look fantastic in the HD version. We were getting more and more impressed with this project as the casting was announced and the realistic pictures were released, but this so-so trailer has put us back on the fence.

One thing's for sure, DC might be falling behind in the Marvel Vs. DC film universe, but with 'Dark Knight' about to strike it rich and "Watchmen" about to own ComicCon, this is surely their week.

"Step Brothers' Deleted Scene Illustrates Film's Spectacular Absurdity

This "Step Brothers" clip hit a day or two ago, but we avoided it cause we didn't want to see any spoilers. Turns out it's a deleted scene from the movie which we saw last night. Without giving away too much or giving too much of a review, hopefully, "Step-Brothers" was wildly ridiculous and spectacularly absurd. So much so we were kind of dumbstruck afterwards. We'd forgotten it was R-Rated and the film is kind of a hard R. It was retarded in the best and worst ways possible and some critics are probably going to hate it, and Ferrell fans might possibly adore it. It's really hard to say. Some way-out segments of the film almost pushed the good-taste envelope too far and there were a couple times the film actually lost the audience. But the more wrong and wildly inappropriate the humor is the harder we tend to laugh for better or worse.

Directed by Adam Mckay, produced by Judd Apatow and starring Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Mary Steenburgen, Richard Jenkins and featuring a stellar jackass comedic turn by Adam Scott ("Veronica Mars" and a small cameo in "Knocked Up") we're actually wildly curious what other people thought about the film. We're still a little unsure ourselves, or at least we'll reserve judgement for a few days. We've probably already said too much.

The film features a shit-ton of pop songs including tracks Vampire Weekend ("A Punk," which kicks off the film) LCD Soundsystem (the same trailer song), Dizee Rascal, Vanilla Ice, Billy Joel, Q-Tip ("Breathe & Stop"), Hall & Oates ("You Make My Dreams Come True" from the trailer), Dillated Peoples, Cheesburger, The Kinks ("Father Christmas") and a score by Jon Brion which features members of Wilco and Deerhoof at times (the latter of which you can really hear the influence of in spots).

Listen: The Kinks - "Father Christmas"
Listen: Vampire Weekend - "A Punk"

The Muppets Take Woody Allen's 'Manhattan'

This is way old, we're sort philosophically opposed to "cute" movie mash-ups, but it's making the rounds again and it's a kind of slow Friday. It's a scene from Woody Allen's "Manhattan" starring Miss Piggy as Diane Keaton and Kermit the Frog as Allen in the famous orgasm scene. And admittedly, it is kind of amusing.

Party Guest: "I finally had an orgasm, and my doctor said it was the wrong kind."
Isaac Davis (Allen): "You had the wrong kind? I've never had the wrong kind, ever. My worst one was right on the money."

New York Mag's David Edelstein Gets Mobbed For His Dissenting 'Dark Knight' Voice, Defends His Position While Dodging Firebombs

With all the breathless adulation for "The Dark Knight" all over the Internet via critics, bloggers, geeks and essentially everyone, you'd think one or two dissenting voices wouldn't be a big deal or make any kind of chinks in the seemingly unassailable armor.

Unfortunately this rational doesn't consider the delusional feelings and emotions of irrational geeks and "Dark Knight" enthusiasts that believe this film is the second coming of Christ and as good as "Citizen Kane" if not better.

One of the first voices to showcase the audacity of dissent about the Christopher Nolan-directed film was New York magazine critic David Edelstein as we noted at the beginning of this week. Had anyone cared to carefully examine his piece, they'd find that while he didn't like the film overall, he didn't exactly savage it with exacting contempt either and everything he wrote was a fair and critical assessments in the appropriate manner any critic should analyse a film ("Nolan appears to have no clue how to stage or shoot action," is not a criticism without merit and it's also not the first time it's been said).

The only thing we took slight issue was with the fact he called it "sadistic." The film is PG13 and not that brutal by any means (though it is psychologically grueling, maybe it's a verbiage quibble). Other comic book films have been skewered far deeper and censured far worse, but this is Batman we're talking about and a flick that the dorks are pretty much unanimous about in their gushing praise, even though most of them have even yet to see it (ah, the geeks, you gotta love them).

Fans made an uproar about Edelstein's "negative" review and the vituperatives on the web started to fly like molotov cocktails lobbied in a all-out street riot. As the L.A. Times notes, the NYMag reviewer has been carpetbombed with so much mob-mentality hatemail he's actually had to take to his Projectionist blog to defend himself (or least have a laugh about it all).

The most amusing point is the flat-out sycophants. "99 percent of these attacks have come from people who haven’t seen the movie," Edelstein writes. "Which is not to say they won’t love it, having so much emotional energy invested in its greatness."

He also reminds the dorks living in their mothers' basement about some of the other embarrassing causes they once fought for. "It took awhile for the fanboys to come around to the consensus that 'The Phantom Menace' was inept — I got death wishes for that review, too" (seriously, where are those guys now?)

Another hilarious attack on the critic is one that says he's "an idiot trying to make a name for himself" and get "hits for his site" (ridiculous assertions). As noted by us and the L.A. Times, both the New Yorker and Time Out New York, didn't much like the film either, but they eluded the mob simply because they weren't their first. Hell, even Vulture is avoiding this discussion since they're blog has been 24-7 'Dark Knight' coverage of late (they probably don't want to get caught in that kind of sticky cross-fire).

The L.A. Times blog points out the meat of Edelstein's piece and it's a salient and well-thought out.

"There has been a lot of chatter in the last few years that criticism is a dying profession, having been supplanted by the democratic voices of the Web. Not to get all Lee Siegel on you, but the Internet has a mob mentality that can overwhelm serious criticism. There is superb writing in blogs and discussion groups ... but there are also thousands of semi-literate tirades that actually reinforce the Hollywood status quo, that say: 'If you do not like "The Dark Knight,'" you should be fired because you do not speak for the people.' Well, the people don't need to be spoken for. And a critic's job is not only to steer you to movies you might not have heard of or that died at the box-office. It's also to bring a different, much-needed perspective on blockbusters like 'The Dark Knight.' "

Amen, brother. God, the whole thing is rather sad and pathetic. And frankly, most of the movie blogs do little too dissuade the opinions that they're semi-coherent lunkheads, let alone the chuckleheads on message boards. Hey man, if the shoe fits... Thank god these yucks aren't Republicans or give a shit about anything outside of getting fantasy land correct on film otherwise the world would be a frightening place. Could you imagine if these guys we're as pro Iraq War as they were Batman? *Shudder*.

Meanwhile, the Box-Office Derby at Box-Office Mojo is predicting the "The Dark Knight" will take in $137.0 million this weekend. That's definitely a reasonable number (our initial guess was around $120-125) and those guys are usually within the ball park, but this weekend could be anyone's guess as obviously all rational thought has been thrown out the window this week (and we must admit we have a lot of disdain for the numbers game that people are obsessed with here, move on, Christ).

For the record, we thought "The Dark Knight" was quite impressive, but it's not without its flaws (the case for Aaron Eckhart? He's not that good), nor will it resonate in any major way in the long term. A fantastic comic book movie? Without a doubt. A masterpiece? Keep your pants on, children.

This Band Will Probably Not Change Your Life: 'Lou Reed's Berlin' Is No Rock Opus

"Lou Reed's Berlin," the concert documentary directed by Julian Schnabel comes out this weekend in New York in limited release. We saw the film back during the Tribeca Film Festival and figured we'd give our review a bit more play for those that had missed it or were planning to check it out this weekend. Opinions on movies are fluid and should grow and change with time if neccesary (rush to judgement reviews aren't ideal), but in this case we feel essentially like we did back in early May.

Some things to keep in mind about the concert film, 'Berlin' directed by insufferable and lovable artiste, Julian Schnabel are this (sacrilegious sacred cow alert!): If you don't love Berlin the album (like know it front to back), this movie might not be for you, unless you're a huge Lou Reed fan (we basically qualify here). Touted as the film that rediscovers - or at least shines a new light on - the Berlin album for a mainstream audiences, much like the LP itself, the film is not without its many flaws.

The well-known backstory here: At the time of its 1973 release Berlin was reviled and so poorly received that Reed and producer Bob Ezrin essentially disavowed it and never played it live (until it was finally performed and shot at the behest of big Berlin enthusiast Schnabel at St. Anne's Warehouse in Brooklyn, New York in December 2006).

Obviously the album has been rechristened as an undiscovered masterpiece for some time now, but this movie reminds us that this claim is overstated no matter what revisionist greatest album lists can be generated. First off "Caroline Says," while a great song is nothing but a sub-par (when compared to) re-write of "Stephanie Says" by the Velvet Underground. Anyone with half an ear can recognize this. Lou rejacks the same lyrics! (maybe cause the VU song was never officially released at the time so he felt it was ok to cannibalize his own work, but still).

The film starts out intercut with a lot of dreamy and stylized footage (shot by daughter Lola Schnabel) of Roman Polanski's wife, the gorgeous French model/actress Emmanuelle Seigner (who also starred in Schnab's 'The Diving Bell & The Butterfly" and is in the band Orange who sang one of the tracks on the film's soundtrack) interspersed throughout the concert. She's acting as a surrogate stand-in for the album's downtrodden protagonist Caroline, and the peppering of this allegorical footage on the live perf works quite well actually (Schnabel Sr. just directed the concert itself). Some have claimed the conceit is rather pretentious and silly, but frankly it's a reprieve from constantly watching boring old Lou on stage the entire time.

But after a bold opening (first 15-20 minutes or so), the Schnab dispenses with the artful trick and the film devotes intself to your standard rock-concert doc that lives and dies by the material and how it's performed and presented. This is where it gets kind of tricky. For one, see above, some of Berlin's material is overwrought prog and always has been (sorry, olds at Rolling Stone) and some of it is beautiful and mournful. That latter material, "Sad Song," "Caroline Says," and "The Kids" is wisely saved for the end, but at times, it becomes a rather difficult mid-section to bear (the Schnab doesn't seem to know what to do with his camera to breathe life into this concert). It doesn't help that Reed was never the best singer in the world, fine, but then he deviates from the original melodies and talk/sings even more and lazier than he did originally (it really kills the mood of some songs that needs some emoting, i.e. melody). PS The fabled story behind the making of "The Kids" and the children crying at the end of the song is one of the great deplorable/awesome rock legends/myths and worth reading about.

And lastly, it is rather telling that the film's most potent moment - the Velvets track "Candy Says" as sung by the tumescent transgendered angel Antony from Antony & The Johnsons - is not even a track from the re-heralded album.

"Lou Reed's Berlin" is by no means terrible and is definitely engrossing at times, but world's most under-appreciated album for concert film? Mmmm...not so much. A greatest hits concert film might have worked a little better, we must sadly admit. [-B] PS. We prefer Street Hassle and woulda paid admission to see "Waltzing Matilda" performed in its entirety with a string section.

Download: Lou Reed - "Berlin"
Watch: Lou Reed - "The Kids" (from Berlin, not the film)

Darren Aronofsky In "Final Talks" For 'RoboCop'Sequel?

Just last week, a trade piece came out reporting director Darren Aronofsky ("Requiem for a Dream") had been one of the many directors circling a remake of Paul Verhoven's "classic" dystopian satire, "Robocop."

The often amusingly unreliable horror-enthusiast site Bloody Disgusting.com is now reporting that Aronofsky is in final talks on the project and are claiming it's not a remake, but rather, a sequel.

The logline they report is: Present day Los Angeles, 20 years after the termination of the RoboCop program, the city decides to reinstate the program.

Some are suggesting the project could be a darker, re-boot style sequel in the vein of "The Dark Knight/Batman Begins" and the "Terminator Salvation" film with Christian Bale. We're just hoping this doesn't mean the end of Aronofsky movies that look like Yes album covers meant to be consumed on psychedelics (see "The Fountain"). Whether it's true is anyone's guess, BloodyD doesn't have the greatest track record, but they do reassure us with their justification of covering the news in the first place. "[The original was] pretty damn bloody, and it's pretty damn disgusting... good enough for [us]." Indeed.

Jarvis Cocker Writing Songs For Wes Anderson's Animated 'The Fantastic Mr. Fox' Film

All has been quiet in Wes Anderson world of late. But fret no further. In an interview with Chicago Time Out ex-Pulp frontman Jarvis Cocker told the magazine that he's going to be involved with Anderson's adaptation of Roald Dahl’s "The Fantastic Mr. Fox" which is due sometime in 2009.

"I’ve written three, four songs, and some of that might become bits of the score," he said. And that's all he's asked and all we have to work with, but it's an interesting development.

The follow-up to 2007's "The Darjeeling Limited" and co-written by Anderson's 'Life Aquatic' screenwriting partner Noah Baumbach, the 'Fox' will be voiced by George Clooney and the rest of the cast are familiar to Anderson-ites including Cate Blanchett, Jason Schwartzman, Bill Murray and Anjelica Huston. This probably means we should read the 'Fox' script we have sometime soon.

This is not Cocker's first foray into films. He wrote songs featuring Radiohead members (Thom Yorke, Jonny Greenwood) for "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire," and as Chi-Time Out reminds us, he wrote a theme for the James Bond flick, "Tomorrow Never Dies" that the studio never used. "They set up a kind of American Idol situation, where they asked about nine different artists to come up with a Bond song. They listen to nine different attempts of working “tomorrow never dies” into a lyric. Consequently, I was really pissed off when they went with Sheryl Crow instead."

In recent Anderson-ian like news, Vampire Weekend latest video, "Oxford Comma," created very much in the Wes aesthetic with exact same Futura bold font to boot, has had the Internet up in arms. This is amusing for two reasons. One, the fact the Stuff That White People like 20-something drones would take umbrage with a band aping a filmmaker that has only made five films (is he a sacred cow already? Surely they wouldn't bat an eyelash if "Citizen Kane" was parroted in a video). Secondly, in the recent SPIN cover story of VWeekend, the guitarist spoke at length about Wes Anderson's films and then later asked that the conversation be struck from the record as if that might blow his cover? Don't you have more important conversation topics to consider out of bounds? Perhaps their inflating egos as allegedly demonstrated by their SXSW behavior?

Watch: Vampire Weekend - "Oxford Comma"
Download: Jarvis Cocker - "Disney Time"

Zack Snyder Knows Him Some Visual Effects In 'Watchmen' Trailer

The much-anticipated trailer for "Watchmen" directed by Zack Snyder is now online (it seems the Empire, who had the exclusive, has been deluged with a traffic onslaught) and man, say what you will about this CGI-heavy filmmaker, but he knows how to translate comic-book looks into spot-on visual effects (we're sure the trailer will be back up in a sec it's below; look at the side-by side comparisons above).

The bigscreen trailer is going to be shown during public screenings of "The Dark Knight" this weekend, us critics (*cough*) didn't get the chance to see it with our viewings.

The striking images are not a surprise to many who already know and adore "300," the visually impressive and homoerotically-charged film about oily Spartan soldiers fighting bravely to their sweaty doom at the Battle of Thermopylae which raked in a left-field boatload at the box-office in the spring of 2007.

Our skepticism over this project has generally eroded over the months. The casting is pretty formidable (Billy Crudup is never one to slouch at) and the first images of the film released were pretty outstanding, but this trailer, aside from the effects, we're sort of on the fence about.
In an EW interview posted yesterday with "Watchmen" comic-book creator and mastermind, the notoriously crotchety Alan Moore, the irascible artists said once again, that his comic shouldn't be made into a movie (he's argued this incessantly over the years once telling the same thing to director Terry Gilliam who was once interested in the project).

While he hasn't seen "300," everything he's heard or seen about the film makes him think it was "racist...homophobic, and above all... sublimely stupid."

When asked if he was even a tad curious what Snyder was doing with the now DC Comics-owned property, Moore said, "I'd rather not know."

It's everywhere now, thanks Alex. The trailer recycles uses "The Beginning is the End is the Beginning” by Smashing Pumpkins a track that is not to be confused with the "Batman & Robin" soundtrack song by the Pumpkins, "The End Is the Beginning Is the End," got that? [ed. we admittedly fell for this too, but have since fixed this piece].

It doesn't play right here and it's corny, but we're assuming this is just a trailer convention meant to wow less discerning geeks who are likely going to go apeshit over it all regardless. We give it a B- overall as there's far too much forced movieness and gratuitous, over-the-top slow-motion, but thank god there are no gauche colors on the heroes. This would have never worked. As you can kind of tell from this post, we sort of went from liking this trailer, to thinking, "wow, that kinda looks ghey," to wondering to ourselves whether we should ever even slightly endorse anything Synder is ever apart of again. We'll wait and see, we guess, but we're sure a big portion of the boy interweb world is freaking out right now. Watchmen is due on March 6th 2009.

Val Kilmer Says Motley Crue Will Need To Find A New David Lee Roth For 'Dirt' Biopic

We've all heard of Motley Crue's long-gestating adaptation of their rock biopic, "The Dirt," right? We'd mentioned some of the casting rumors that had floated around a couple years ago just recently.

The project has been in limbo for a few years now and a long while ago, Val Kilmer's name had come up to play Van Halen's David Lee Roth (and Christopher Walken as Ozzy Osbourne). Well, it was basically just a rumor and Kilmer just told MTV, hearsay or not, he's too old to play the part anyhow.

"It won't die!" Kilmer told MTV of the rumor. "I don't know how that started. [He puts his hands on his head.] Why?!? Nothing against the greatness of the mighty Roth but ... plus I'm way too old. They need a gymnast to play that. You need a guy with funny hair."

Well, that's that. In other sort-of rock related news, Kilmer said it was hipster New Yorker Sean Lennon who had a great idea for a sequel to the 1985 comedy classic "Real Genius" which Val totally loved (note: "Real Genius" is amazing). "Sean Lennon loved that film when he was a boy. He had a great idea for a sequel. I told [famed producer] Brian Grazer. It's pretty good. Now [Chris] is a teacher because those who can't do, teach. And the whole story revolves around a student that's a fan. A girl's got a crush on him, and they set up to destroy him, like the faculty [did] when he was a student."

We're not sure a sequel some 25 years later is a good idea, but busting out 'RG' for another screening is never a bad idea.

I love this scene. The song is "Number One" by Chas Jankel. Nostalgia is a deadly weapon, we've always felt that way and there are a superfluity of bad '80s movies that people take up the painfully misguided cause for in the name of reminiscence, but this is not one of them.

Roman Polanski Asks L.A. D.A. OfficeTo Screen & Review 'Wanted & Desired' On His Defense & Behalf; 30-Year-Old Case *Could* Be Dismissed Or Reopened

Wow, this is kind of big.

Did Roman Polanski finally watch the Marina Zenovich directed documentary about himself and his now 30-year-old statutory rape case, "Roman Polanski: Wanted & Desired"? (he had decided to not be involved and had claimed a few months ago that he had not seen it)

Does the exiled filmmaker who has been a fugitive of U.S. since 1978 want back in the States or at least to have his name partly cleared?

Could be, as he's asking the L.A. prosecutors to review the film. According to the NYTimes, "Mr. Polanski and his lawyer have asked the Los Angeles district attorney’s office to review [the aforementioned documentary] in which a former deputy district attorney claims to have coached the judge in the case."

The Judge in the case, Laurence J. Rittenband died in 1993 and the documentary shows many, many pretty blatant ethical and legal improprieties on his part that even the prosecuting lawyer at the time took umbrage with (as depicted first hand in the doc from his interviews, he had major problems with the way Rittenband handled himself).

Polanski's lawyer Douglas Dalton, the same lawyer who defended the director in '78, told the Times. “There could be a motion to dismiss based on prosecutorial misconduct.”

As the Times notes former prosecutor, David Wells himself describes that he advised Judge Rittenband to send Mr. Polanski to prison for a psychiatric review, though Mr. Wells was not involved with the case and these moves and suggestions could have been dubiously legal (if not obviously illegal) . “We want to develop information about the extent of the ex parte contacts, what other communications Wells had, whether anybody else was aware of them, that sort of thing,” Dalton said.

The Times also contacted Wells who denied that his contact with the judge had been improper. “I didn’t tell him to do it or that he should do it. “I just told him what his options were.”

Though it seems doubtful whether the case could be reopened after all this time and fugitives have little standing to press conventional appeals, Polanski himself wrote in an email to the Gray Lady. “I’m not ruling anything out,” he said. “I believe that closure of that entire matter is long overdue.”

Could a documentary feature reverse the decision of the law? Wouldn't be the first time. Erroll Morris' "The Thin Blue Line," did exactly that.

Oscar-Bait Watch Trailer Season Begins: 'Body Of Lies'

Leo! Scott! Russell! That's got premeditated Oscar event written all over it, no? The international trailer for director Ridley Scott's "Body of Lies" is out. He's been kind of irking us these days making the same, near-3-hour epic Oscar-bait drama with A-list stars (Denzel, Crowe) over and over again ("American Gangster" was pretty disappointing and more of the same). The synop and trailer frankly, look like more of the same big, humorless dramas that appeal to old Academy voters (though not lately) and geek bloggers who kid themselves into thinking this is as good as drama gets. It's a taut game of cat and mouse! It's a potboiling thriller! God, how many times have we seen this from Scott? It's basically about Two opposing CIA operatives with the same objectives, but different morals in Jordan:

Based on Washington Post columnist David Ignatius' 2007 novel about a CIA operative, Roger Ferris (Leonardo DiCaprio), who uncovers a lead on a major terrorist leader suspected to be operating out of Jordan. When Ferris devises a plan to infiltrate his network, he must first win the backing of cunning CIA veteran Ed Hoffman (Russell Crowe) and the collegial, but perhaps suspect, head of Jordanian intelligence. Although ostensibly his allies, Ferris questions how far he can really trust these men without putting his entire operation - and his life - on the line.

Scott told the Irish Independent, "It's about Islam, where we are and where we're not, and it's a very interesting, proactive, internalised view of that whole subject."

The film does also feature the excellent Dutch actress Carice van Houten who's been getting a ton of American film work ever since her noticed turn in Paul Verhoven's "Black Book," in 2006 ("Valkyrie" is another) but other than that, meh and wake us when something interesting happens. The trailer feels a little Tony Scott too.

Is The Chorus For Heath Ledger's Oscar Dying Down?

When "The Dark Knight" started screening earlier this month, some of the more breathless "critics" (we use this term lightly, these ones were on-air TV hacks) started banging the drum for the "Heath Ledger should win an Oscar" campaign. As were wont to do, we got annoyed at people making early proclamations out of their ass.

Then we saw the film and thought there might be something to all this Oscar talk as Ledger's slippery and electrical performance, which evades a lot of predictable beats, was rather amazing. Even then we're still not completely convinced and we're not totally ruling it out. We're marinating on it (something bang the drum fools should try once and a while), it's early days people and we don't know what's in store for the rest of the year.

However, according to Reuters, "Oscar watchers and veteran critics," are starting to dismiss this notion claiming it was started by Internet buzz and loser bloggers. Wait one second! Normally, we'd agree with you fanboy bloggers are usually the first to make these pronouncements, but the first person to actually proclaim that Ledger would be a lock for an Oscar nom was L.A. TV critic hack Sam Rubin. Not a loser blogger at all, but rather a loser talking head movie critic. (sounding much like an IMDB message board geek he wrote, "Ledger is THE BEST villain in a super hero movie of all time!").

Back to Reuters' story. They remind us all that while people like James Dean and Spencer Tracy were nominated after their deaths, only one person has ever won an Oscar posthumously and that was Peter Finch for 1976's "Network" (a Best Actor Oscar no less; the award was accepted by his widow and he bested Robert DeNiro's "Taxi Driver" performance)

"All this Oscar talk is a phenomenon of the Internet age that I like to call 'a wish-fulfillment rumor.' If people say it often enough, they think it will happen," "Entertainment Tonight" film critic Leonard Maltin said. Then again, when was the last time anyone gave a fuck what Leonard Maltin said?

Tom O'Neil from The Envelope.com, said "it really looks good" for a nomination but was "a long shot" to win. The fact that Tracy and Dean were denied posthumous Oscars O'Neil thinks is evidence that Academy voters would rather vote for someone alive so as not to make it a solemn affair. "That's how reluctant Oscar voters are to hug the dead," O'Neil said. "These awards are all about hugs and there's something creepy about embracing the dead."

Great, a Reuters posit based on two critics, one who hasn't aged, changed his look or been relevant since the heydays of John Tesh. Ledger was beloved in Hollywood, he has that. So a nomination could happen, but yeah, an Oscar win does seem dubious at this point. But it is early days.

As our buddy Otis, the EIC from Dusted magazine, recently articulated rather well to us recently, "The Dark Knight" could have trouble being taken overly-serious by some critics and audiences (though to be fair to the context, he thinks Ledger is a shoe-in). "It tried to be a gritty crime drama, [but those films] need to have some semblance of believability. The Joker's series of crimes simply aren't. You need to seriously suspend disbelief, which is totally fine and expected in superhero movies (it's why we go to them in the first place), but not in 5-star dramas. I felt that this film tried to be both and didn't quite pull it off."

We insert that here because we think he has a point. Also, another critical review from TimeOut new York today. Their biggest beef is the running time, the crammed-in too-many themes and the failed attempt to balance action and drama ("this is Batman, not Bergman"). "The fact that Nolan’s padded popcorn flick isn’t the streamlined masterpiece it could have been is a real buzzkill," writes very respectable critic David Fear.

'The Wire' Mostly Shut Out Of The Emmys, Burn It All Down

We don't watch TV cause we don't have time for that trite episodic nonsense. We've got cinema to watch. However, you'll notice we made an exception for the remarkable HBO Baltimore inner city drama "The Wire."

Well, here's another reason why we don't watch TV. Creator David Simon's show got mostly shut-out completely from this morning's Emmy announcements, which is pretty much cause to burn down your TV set and shoot anyone on their nomination board on first sight (we erred, it got a nom for writing — Simon's teleplay for the finale — but that's it??). As Bunk would say about this kind of weak bitch-assness, "that's some shameful shit."

T-Bone Burnett Composing Score For CMT's Country Music Drama 'Crazy Heart'

Country Music Telvision is getting into the TV movie business. Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jeff Bridges and Robert Duvall will all star in the country music drama, "Crazy Heart." T Bone Burnett, the composer and producer who made a splash at the Grammys in 2001 with the music composed for "O Brother, Where Art Thou?," will be writing the film's original music and soundtrack.

The plot focuse on an unlucky and downtrodden, alcoholic country music singer (Bridges) who attempts to get his life and career back on track with the help and love of a female reporter (Gyllenhaal). The film is supposed to start next month around Santa Fe, N.M and Bridges will actually perform some of the original songs in the film.

No word on what Duvall's role is (Bridge's dad?), but obviously he's starred in very similar film starring a down and out alcoholic country star saved by a woman, 1983's "Tender Mercies."

Teddy Geiger Scores 'The Rocker'; Unloved Rainn Wilson Film Dumped Once Again...

How bad can Rainn Wilson's "The Rocker" be? That's a bad question to ask of us, as we hate his shtick and wouldn't be caught dead paying for one of his films. But what about you, the undiscerning public that won't mind chomping away at nachos while guffawing along to all his stupid corny jokes?

For one it's been pushed back AGAIN. First it was due in the spring, then it was scheduled for the beginning of August and now it's been dumped to late August, again. Is this the most unloved film of 2008? In May, the official site for this thing still read "coming spring 2008!" (it had already been pushed to the summer at that point). Now the film's website is in such disrepair (it's basically broken) it's like they gave up, threw their hands in the and air and said, "fuck it."

The other thing that we didn't realize is that milquetoast Buffalo singer/songwriter wuss Teddy Geiger is part of the film's cast and he wrote much of the soundtrack and rock songs in the film which features a cover of Poison's "Nothin' But A Good Time" (which you can hear below). The soundtrack, which comes out July 22, also features tracks by Vesuvius, the fake '80s band that Wilson's character was once in (written by the film's score composer Chad Fischer and some of his buddies).

This chuckleheaded conceit centers on a failed, over-the-hill drummer (Wilson) who, 20 years after getting booted out of his now uber-famous band, gets a second chance at fame with a new act, a high school garage band headed by his nephew (Josh Gad). It also stars name brand actress Christina Applegate and poor, cute little actress Emma Stone (get a new agent m'dear!). Never has a studio (Fox Atomic) seemingly cared less. Remember the ill-fated movie "Rock Star," with Mark Wahlberg and Jennifer Aniston based on the Judas Priest story when Rob Halford left the band and a Priest cover band singer joined the band in his stead? Umm, yeah. Hollywood needs to remember rock movies about nobodies generally never work.