What i did on my summer holidays

To this day I don't know for 確かな who shopped me, although I 嫌疑者，容疑者／疑う the 地区 nurse, who kept 告発する／非難するing me of looking peaky and not getting enough fresh 空気／公表する. Perhaps she was 権利 - you couldn't get fresh 空気／公表する 一連の会議、交渉／完成する our way, 特に if you spent every waking minute crouched over the 解雇する／砲火／射撃 with a brickthick library 調書をとる／予約する called The Fifth Form At St Dominic's.

How they got me to this seaside gulag I no longer 解任する. Perhaps they used 逮捕するs. What I do remember, to 引用する Gertrude Stein on an 平等に desolate 位置／汚点／見つけ出す, is that when I got there, there was no there there.

There were acres of sea and sand ahead of me, and acres of grass behind me.

This was not the seaside I had learned about from the pages of my Film Fun comic. Where was the helter- skelter? Where were the dodgems?

Where was the candy floss? Where were the fish and 半導体素子s?

There was fish all 権利, but not as I knew it. Fish, to my mind, （機の）カム 調印（する）d in golden 乱打する and …を伴ってd by 半導体素子s, with salt and vinegar. This fish would have felt at home on one of those healthconscious menus that nowadays infest school dinners. The fish was steamed and smothered in white sauce. The potatoes were boiled. I did not eat them.

HE bad news is that 密談する／（身体を）寄せ集めるd 集まりs of children will be plucked in their millions from playing in the street and 素早い行動d to American-style summer （軍の）野営地，陣営s, some of them as young as 11.

The good news is that unless they tunnel out, they will not be 推定する／予想するd to stay in 保護／拘留 for more than a week.

This is certainly an 改良 on my own experience long ago of a 類似の 実験, where I served a 十分な fortnight without 仮釈放（する） in an 会・原則 called uneuphemistically the Poor Children's Holiday （軍の）野営地，陣営, hating every minute of it.

SO THERE was nothing to eat and nothing to do. There was a goat in the 隣接するing field and we amused ourselves by feeding it lumps of coal.

さもなければ there were organised games. I did no t do games.

Instead, I mooched. Mooching around the collection of huts which made up the summer （軍の）野営地，陣営 I （機の）カム across a glass-前線d miniature library which 含む／封じ込めるd, to my delight, a copy of The Fifth Form At St Dominic's, from which I had been so rudely parted to serve my 宣告，判決.

I was just reaching up for the 容積／容量 when the Warden （機の）カム in and 堅固に の近くにd the bookcase.

調書をとる／予約するs, he explained, were for bad 天候. It was not raining, so why didn't I take myself outside and gulp 負かす／撃墜する some more fresh 空気／公表する?

The Warden and his wife were kindly souls but they did not understand the needs of city urchins which were for helter- skelters, picture houses and fish and 半導体素子s.

Across the bay, at night as I lay in bed, I could see the twinkling lights of Morecambe where people would be riding the dodgems and scoffing candy floss. I longed to be の中で them, a 解放する／自由な spirit, but my 計画（する）s to escape （機の）カム to nothing.

It was the longest fortnight I have ever spent in my life. After an eternity of unremitting fresh 空気／公表する I was returned home as brown as a nut, and I have detested the sight and smell of grass ever since.

No 疑問 the 政府 summer （軍の）野営地，陣営s for kids in England and むちの跡s will be a sophisticated 改良 on the Poor Children's gulag. Laptops for all, I'll 令状.

But, with health zealots running the show, I bet it will still be steamed fish, white sauce and no 半導体素子s.

ばか者，雇い暴力団 show

THE 需要・要求するs of 大統領 Bush's hordes of 安全 ばか者，雇い暴力団s get ever more impertinent. Not content with wanting Central London の近くにd 負かす／撃墜する for the visit - they will 達成する that 目的（とする）, whatever the Met may say now - they want the Queen to 任命する／導入する 爆破- proof windows at Buckingham Palace, 強化する the 塀で囲むs and so on.

She has やめる rightly told them, politely, to take a running jump. She has also pointed out that with 3,000 police on the 職業, Dubya will not be going unguarded. She could have 追加するd that, unlike the Americans, we have never yet lost a 大統領.

There will be 出来事/事件s, of course, and Mr Bush will be lucky to get away without egg on his 直面する. I 推定する／予想する we shall 選ぶ up the 乾燥した，日照りの きれいにする 法案.

Is it too much to ask that this is the last of these expensive and ますます pointless 公式訪問s to London? No good ever comes of them - not to us anyway.

Tony Blair will only 再確認する the popular 見解（をとる） that he is 大統領 Bush's poodle. Londoners will go around for days in a furious temper.

If we have to entertain world leaders, can't we just get the Poet Laureate to compose them a singing 電報電信?