'殺し屋' parents' evenings, 削減（する）-throat birthday parties and perfect yummy mummys: 悩ますd parent of a 10-year-old 明らかにする／漏らすs it's '殺人 in motherland'

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It is a truth universally 定評のある that a working mother is frequently in need of a psychiatrist or a publican and, in my experience, often both.?

Why else would white ワイン 瓶／封じ込めるs come with screw 最高の，を越すs? And as the hugely entertaining TV series Motherland brilliantly shows, the chances of keeping all your marbles while trying to 'have it all' are 限られた／立憲的な.

The new show, which 星／主役にするs 悩ますd working mum-of-two Julia, has created a 教団 ヘロイン for modern Britain, one which speaks to 類似して-afflicted mums all over the country ? normal mums 戦う／戦いing with immaculately coiffed, yoga-sculpted, sharp-肘d 競争相手s 決定するd to spend 注目する，もくろむ-watering 量s on a child's party.

It is already compulsive 見解（をとる）ing, even though all six episodes were only put on to iPlayer last week.?

Probably, those 見解（をとる）ing 人物／姿／数字s were driven by women just like Julia ? binge watching, flaked out on the sofa while eating their children's leftovers for supper. Much like me.

The Queen Bee: Impossibly polished Amanda (Lucy Punch) is a merciless, Boden-覆う？ school gate shark who 支配するs with a string of 活発に 積極的な put-負かす／撃墜するs and the 星／主役にする of new BBC sitcom Motherland. But what about the real '悩ますd;mothers, asks Sam Taylor

For as the working mother of a ten-year-old, my world is one of 'panic parenting' is every bit as colourful as Julia's life on 審査する.

Like me, Julia is so time poor she begins almost every 宣告，判決 with the words: 'No 圧力, but how long will this take?'?

Her daily 裁判，公判s and tribulations perfectly 逮捕（する） the intensively 競争の激しい undercurrents and barely 隠すd 大混乱 that define modern day motherhood.?

With 分裂（する） hairs and snagged tights, her 直面する 直す／買収する，八百長をするd in a rictus grin, Julia is a woman on a 使節団 to just get through the day without 殺人ing someone, and most mothers know how that feels.

I know how that feels. My life is a patchwork of plasters 適用するd over the gaping 穴を開けるs in our family's 国内の 始める，決める-up. Every day for Julia ? and for me ? 現在のs a familiar 始める，決める of 犯罪-laden moral 窮地s.?

Will she be able to make it to the fun run? Probably not, I never can. Will the Yummy Mummies at the school gates notice that she has forgotten it's dress up as a bumble bee for charity day? Almost certainly yes, from my experience, at least.

Having friends as 支援する-up helps. Julia has Liz, the 選び出す／独身 mother whose own parenting style is half-Roseanne and half-Patsy from Ab Fab.?

Her tips on how to entertain young children at a party are priceless: 'Throw a 続けざまに猛撃する coin in a room and when they run in after it, の近くに the door.'

After all, can there be a more 競争の激しい 円形競技場 for mothers than the children's party? My own 試みる／企てるs are woefully 不十分な compared to those of the women who run the PTA.

They could be running the UN if they weren't putting so much energy into 今後 planning their children's 年次の events, which seem to be designed 単独で to make others howl with envy. 明白に this howling all takes place on the inside. Outside, we are all the 'best of friends'.

The 選び出す／独身 mum: Liz (Diane Morgan) brings a refreshingly honest 知恵 as Julia's best friend. Used to work at the CAB 'until one of her calls was 記録，記録的な／記録するd for training 目的s' and is loathed by the alphas for sleeping with one of their 'fat' husbands?

One woman I know recently 始める，決める the 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業 やめる high when she 扱う／治療するd herself to a headset microphone to 始める，決める off the lycra bodysuit she wore on 行う／開催する／段階 to orchestrate the dance 決まりきった仕事s for the children …に出席するing her son's ninth birthday 祝賀.?

The 決まりきった仕事 took part in a ballroom, with professional ダンサーs paid to partner the 30 precious little guests. The food was catered by celebrity chef Yotam Ottolenghi.

Really? Then there are the '（手先の）技術 driven' parties that are 平等に as bonkers. We 現在／一般に have an 招待する to a Halloumi Making Experience (why?), and a Weave A Rug party (again, why?).

I 特に warmed to the episode in which Julia 試みる／企てるs, but fails, to throw her ten-year-old a party. Last year my ten-year-old ended up with a あわてて organised Christmas bash in the 地階 of the 地元の pub.?

The 大混乱／混沌とした mum: Protagonist Julia (Anna Maxwell-ツバメ) is trying to 持つ／拘留する 負かす／撃墜する a high-力／強力にするd 職業 while trying to find someone - anyone - to look after her kids. Lives in a 明言する／公表する of barely disguised panic as she tries to emulate the alpha mums?

We hurriedly 調書をとる／予約するd a DJ from Gumtree who turned up with a boot 負担 of Gangnam 記録，記録的な／記録するs and an ice machine that wasn't 'アレルギー friendly'.?

The pub threw in some pizzas, crisps, and some lurid orange squash 十分な of E numbers that are definitely on the 禁止（する） 名簿（に載せる）／表（にあげる） in our corner of Islington.

The children loved it, of course, but I am now known as Pub Mum, which 明らかに is not a 称する，呼ぶ／期間／用語 of endearment.?

I am also known as part of the group of women who just '減少（する） off'. Those of us who have 職業s have long ago given up any pretence that we want to stand around chatting over the prosecco at the party while our children are entertained at someone else's expense.

It does mean that I don't always have the 手段 of my daughter's friends when I arrive to collect her, however.?

Once, I was waiting with the dog outside a party when she （機の）カム excitedly running out and introduced me to the birthday girl, who 始める，決める about 一打／打撃ing our faithful old pet. 'Do you have a dog, darling?' I asked. 'No,' she replied. 'But we do have a Bentley.'

And this is one of the greatest problems for working mothers ? the 抱擁する gaps in our knowledge about our children's everyday lives.

Occasionally I manage that rare 扱う／治療する; the school 選ぶ-up. There are lots of wonderful women (and men) to be 設立する standing around at 3.15pm who are lovely to dilettantes like me.?

But it has to be 認める that at every school gate there is also a strong cohort of scarily organised busty blonde Amanda in Motherland, all of whom deserve an A-加える for smugness.?

I discovered this recently when I asked the 身元 of the woman talking to my daughter. 'She's her teacher,' （機の）カム her 減少（する）-jawed reply. For the 記録，記録的な／記録する, she was new.

When Julia arrives late for a parents' evening, taxi running outside, she says 'just give me the trailer 最高潮の場面s'.?

I sympathise. I was so exhausted recently I 設立する myself sitting in the wrong classroom in the wrong 贈呈, wondering why my daughter was gesturing frantically outside the door

I once dashed across town to join m y daughter at a playdate only to turn up at the wrong house.?

There 続いて起こるd a very 混乱させるing conversation on the doorstep with a terrified looking woman who thought I was 告発する／非難するing her of stealing my child. 結局 I had to give up and go 支援する to work, hoping that wherever she was, she was 承認する.

Cake sales are another minefield and I wish we could call time on them ? who eats all those cakes??

One friend spent years 戦う／戦いing the 犯罪 of sending her children into school with a 'shop bought' cake until she （機の）カム to a を取り引きする a 地元の パン職人 to produce authentic 'handmade' looking Victoria sponges that are placed into an 老年の cake tin.?

They've so far won her prizes and pats on the 支援する for managing to be such a 広大な／多数の／重要な multi-tasker. I've agreed not to 指名する her here on the understanding that she gives me his number.

The husband of Julia is always somewhere else if needed. Of course, men cannot be 非難するd for all the woes 直面するd by career women.?

But let's 直面する it ? hiding behind every frazzle-直面するd 女性（の） juggling too many balls is usually a man hoping not to be 選ぶd for the team.

My husband is a master at remaining unselected. He has an 無傷の 15-year 記録，記録的な／記録する at 避けるing dressing up as Santa, or stuffing party 捕らえる、獲得するs 十分な of toys.?

Julia can at least call on her drippy friend Kevin, a stay at home dad fully 詩（を作る）d in the 最新の parenting theories.

My husband on the other 手渡す is an 専門家 at 避けるing becoming 重さを計るd 負かす／撃墜する with any of the finer 詳細（に述べる）s of childcare.?

So much so his 1950s parenting style, which is best 述べるd as a sort of benevolent neglect, is 見解（をとる）d with alarm by the 自由主義の chattering classes that （不足などを）補う the backbone of our daughter's 明言する／公表する 最初の／主要な in Islington.

We are still 回復するing from a morning last year when I was racing out of the door to a 会合 and I noticed that our daughter still had the 直面する paint on she'd got at a 祝日，祝う the previous day.?

With no time to stop, I shouted at him to 'make sure she washes it off before school' and ran. He nodded, but as my mother was fond of 説, it was in one ear, and out the other.

It wasn't until they were one street away from the school gates that he suddenly noticed her 直面する was covered in a lurid spider's web of purple and 黒人／ボイコット.

Panicked, he pulled his handkerchief out and dipped it in a puddle of rain water and then proceeded to rub it all over her 直面する, leaving her with a smeary mess.

I hear that, on arriving in class, there was a 統一するd intake of breath from students and teachers alike.?

It was about an hour later that the social 労働者 called me at work to say she had been 通知するd by the 長，率いる that Georgie's father was 陳列する，発揮するing 'erratic behaviour'.?

Why did I think he washed his child's 直面する with a hanky dipped in puddle water? At the 危険 of 明言する／公表するing the obvious, I replied that perhaps she might like to ask him instead.

Perhaps it is no surprise that Motherland is hilarious, as it is written by Sharon Horgan, who also wrote Channel 4's award-winning couples comedy, 大災害, and Graham Linehan who gave us Father Ted. But the real 推論する／理由 it is funny, is that it is true.

最終的に, what the show teaches us is that Julia wants what we all want: our mothers to come along and take care of everything.

But the days of Watch With Mother are over ? this is now Watching Mothers 落ちる Apart on prime-time television.

'I really want my children to be brought up like I was, by my mother,' Julia wails. But granny, like mummy, wants her own life now. And who can 非難する her?