Our make or break holidays that led to long-称する，呼ぶ／期間／用語 LOVE: As a new 熟考する／考慮する 示唆するs first trips abroad are the ultimate 関係 実験（する）, four 最高の，を越す authors remember theirs

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One in ten new couples 分裂（する） up during their first holiday together, with 5 per cent breaking up before even arriving at their 目的地. The main 推論する／理由? Discovering a partner’s 以前 hidden bad habits! We asked four midlife authors about their own first holiday as a couple ― and how they 生き残るd it . . .

IT WAS FAR FROM PLAIN SAILING . . .

Hunter Davies

Four authors spoke candidly about their first holiday as a couple, 含むing?Hunter Davies who went abroad with Margaret after 存在 together for almost two years (pictured together in Holland in 1958)

My girlfriend Margaret and I had been going out for almost two years and still not slept together.

This was the Fifties, not the 1850s ― a long time before sex was invented, によれば poet Philip Larkin, who 時代遅れの it to 1963, the year of The Beatles’ first LP. I suppose in considering it we were ahead of the game, ahead of our times.

I was still a student, in my last year at Durham University, 老年の 20, and Margaret was in her first year at Oxford, 老年の 18. One very 前進するd, enlightened middle-class girl at her college had given her the 指名する of a Harley Street 専門家, Dr Helena Wright, who had fitted her for a diaphragm.

The Pill had not yet been invented. I was too 脅すd to use a condom or even be seen in a 化学者／薬剤師’s shop asking for one. Anyway, Margaret did not 信用 me to be able to organise any sort of contraception.

To celebrate and christen the diaphragm, we had arranged to go on our first foreign holiday together: a sailing trip to Friesland in Holland with five fellow student friends of 地雷 from Durham. We had to 調印する a form 説 we could sail, which was a total fib, then off we went in our four little boats.

We managed to get out of the harbour and into Lake Sneekermeer. We were 進歩ing やめる 井戸／弁護士席 when we noticed a monster 船 approaching. I said to Margaret: ‘We will tack left to 避ける it.’ She said: No, we will tack 権利.’ As we argued, the 船 went 権利 into us.

It 攻撃する，衝突する us in the middle, 解除するing our boat up high, then deposited both of us in the water, either 味方する of the 船.

Hunter (pictured) and Margaret got married two years after their first holiday together. The couple went on to have three children and stayed married for 55 years

We were dragged out of the water and 再結合させるd our friends, but, as our boat was now 難破させるd, we had to squeeze in with one of our friends, who was on his own.

Our first night of long-を待つd bliss was spent crammed into his little boat, which didn’t have a cabin, just an awning you pulled over at night, with this 選び出す／独身 friend lying beside us.

We did manage it after a fashion, but it was not 正確に／まさに a perfect beginning to the joys of intimacy.

Nonetheless, we got married two years later, in 1960, the day after Margaret 卒業生（する）d from Oxford. We went on to have three children and stayed married for 55 years, until my wife died three years ago.

Margaret never talked about that holiday without a shudder.

Happy Old Me by Hunter Davies (£16.99, Simon and Schuster).

WE NEVER RAN OUT OF LAUGHTER

Amanda Craig

Amanda Craig pictured with 略奪する on their roadtrip through フラン, says they each had £200 to last for their two-week holiday

Whoever said ‘for better or for worse, but never for lunch’ forgot to 追加する ‘or Stansted Airport’.

When my beloved and I first got together, we were too madly in love to notice anything but each other. Our first holiday, a road trip through フラン, （機の）カム as a 法外な learning curve, though not as 法外な as when the ブレーキs on his 古代の Deux Chevaux failed.

Not only did the Citroen 2CV look like a fried egg on wheels, it moved downhill like one. ‘Stop! Stop!’ I shrieked as he pumped madly on the pedal. We 避けるd the tree, but ended up in the 溝へはまらせる／不時着する, 損なわれない, but on the point of our first-ever 列／漕ぐ／騒動.

He is (of course) a brilliant driver: I had failed my 実験（する） three times. But this didn’t stop me 存在 a nightmare 乗客.

My beloved was brought up to 命令（する） a platoon, ideally of the 王室の 海洋s. I 辞退する, point blank, to do unnecessary physical 演習 such as climbing mountains at noon to see yet another 古代の monument, but am perfectly happy to sit under a tree as he 告発（する），告訴（する）／料金s about.

He immerses himself in 旅程s and 地図／計画するs, while I have only the vaguest idea where we are 長，率いるd.

We never quarrelled about money. As he was doing a PhD and I was 令状ing my first novel, we each had £200 for our two-week holiday.

Our money went on 石油 and accommodation ― but buying fresh bread and fruit in フラン is no hardship. Almost everybody is a 支配（する）／統制する freak about something; the question is whether your neuroses are 両立できる. I do not care about food, ワイン, sightseeing or fashion if I have sleep, peace, shade and a good 調書をとる／予約する (ideally a 探偵，刑事 novel).

He can sleep on any bed, is 消費するd by curiosity about culture, never minds the hot sun and loves a good 調書をとる／予約する. I travel with a pillow; he 主張するs on bringing enormously 激しい 作品 of Victorian literature.

He thought スーツケースs on wheels unmanly, 反して my 目的（とする） in life is to glide along with 最小限 exertion.

In the course of this holiday, we each changed to become わずかに more like the other.

Amanda (pictured) who has been with 略奪する for 30 years, says she learned how to be punctual from him?

From him, I learned to be punctual after years of hoping for the best when catching a フェリー（で運ぶ）, train or 計画（する） and to always bring a 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業 of travelling chocolate and proper walking shoes, rather than the elegant footwear I loved.

From me, he learned to shamelessly 押し進める 選び出す／独身 beds together as one, to 需要・要求する ice in water and (however poor you feel) to tip everyone who helps you.

We stayed in appalling places that would have broken many couples. Rooms with Astroturf on the 天井. Rooms 直面するing blank 塀で囲むs. Rooms 直接／まっすぐに over the 洗面所 below ― with a 穴を開ける in our 床に打ち倒す, so you heard and smelled everything.

The car was broken into (once) and broke 負かす／撃墜する (twice). At this point, my beloved 自白するd that, every time he’d been on holiday with a girlfriend, they would go （軍の）野営地，陣営ing.

‘And?’

‘It always ended in 涙／ほころびs,’ he 認める.

But, without 空気／公表する 条件ing or even a cassette player on those long summer 運動s, we never ran out of conversation or laughter ― which, in my 見解（をとる）, is the basis for a happy marriage.

And, 30 years later, it still is.

The 嘘（をつく） Of The Land by Amanda Craig (£8.99, Abacus).

THE FIRST (AND LAST) AS JUST US TWO

Louise Doughty

Louise Doughty pictured holidaying in Tuscany with partner Jerome, recounts 存在 30-years-old when they had their first holiday?

Viano is the 肉親，親類d of place you don’t think 存在するs any more: a 中世 village in northern Tuscany, perched on 最高の，を越す of a high mountain. Inhabitants at the last count: 63. We arrived after dark, 運動ing up a 法外な hill on a switchback road. What were we coming to?

We might 同様に have been thinking it about each other. He was 33 and I was 30. Our 関係 was new; the 未来 had not been discussed.

We parked the car and wandered in the 不明瞭 along an old borgo village street to a tiny 石／投石する 郊外住宅, one-up, one-負かす／撃墜する.

We 設立する the hidden 重要な. It was only in the morning when we went 負かす／撃墜する to the high-beamed kitchen and threw open the shutters to the terrace that we saw the breathtaking 見解（をとる）: mountains 範囲d before us in every shade of green to misty grey.

At sunset, it would become a panorama of orange and purple. It was one of the most beautiful places I had been in my life.

The first holiday you take as a couple is usually the first time you live together , so there were a couple of sticky moments that week. He 手配中の，お尋ね者 to play 激しく揺する music in a cassette player when I was loving the silence.

I was happy with the 地元の inn; he, 一方／合間, preferred to 運動 across Tuscany in search of the perfect restaurant.

But the most important thing we discovered was that we were relaxed in each other’s company. One exquisitely still afternoon, we lay in the long grass on a nearby hillside while he sketched the village and I read a 調書をとる／予約する.

Louise (pictured) says their trip to Viano in?northern Tuscany was their first and holiday alone together, as she became 妊娠している a few months later?

These are the ways in which a 関係 is knitted ― not by its 劇の moments, but by its 静かな ones.

A couple of days into our stay, I went for a walk by myself around the village. It was 中央の-afternoon and most of the inhabitants were on siesta.

The only people I 遭遇（する）d were three women, a ll dressed in 黒人／ボイコット, much shorter and rounder than me.

They stopped me and began speaking in Italian. By their gestures, I worked out that they were wondering aloud why a woman of my age had no children. Perhaps it was because I was so strangely tall and thin.

Viano was the first and last holiday my partner and I took alone together. A few months later, I accidentally became 妊娠している, and the conversation we’d never had about our 未来 became redundant.

We moved in together six weeks before our daughter was born. Another beautiful girl followed five years later.

That first child is a 卒業生（する） now, and yet we still 港／避難所’t managed another holiday alone together. When our girls were small, we revisited Viano, just for an hour, showing them the 狭くする 石／投石する streets.

I like to think we might go 支援する together one day. The old ladies in 黒人／ボイコット will be long gone, but Viano will be as sleepy, a small dream of a place where the 未来 feels unimaginable, but is waiting to be 明らかにする／漏らすd as morning breaks.

壇・綱領・公約 Seven by Louise Doughty (£14.99, Faber & Faber) is out August 22.

WE PASSED THE BACKPACKING TEST

Sarfraz Manzoor

Sarfraz Manzoor pictured with Bridget during their Indian adventure, says they met while he was travelling from the Hay Literature Festival in June 2008

I was returning on the train from the Hay Literature Festival in June 2008 when I 設立する myself sitting opposite a beautiful woman.

We got talking and, the に引き続いて 週末, Bridget and I had our first date.

During that date, she について言及するd she was planning on travelling to India for eight months in the autumn. Within weeks, I had fallen hard in love with Bridget and the idea of 存在 apart from her that long felt intolerable. Bridget felt the same, so we settled on a 妥協: she would halve how long she was in India and I would join her for the last seven weeks.

The day before she flew out, I gave her a small ビデオ camera and a pack of ビデオテープs (this was before Skype and FaceTime) and, while she was in India and I was in London, Bridget and I would film ビデオ postcards to send to each other every week.

Finally, it was time to 飛行機で行く to India to join her.

We had known each other only a few months, but we would now be thousands of miles from home in a country that could be challenging at best.

During those seven weeks, we travelled from Dehra Dun on the 山のふもとの丘s of the Him alayas to Rajasthan and Goa.

We 棒 elephants in Jaipur, took a train through Karnataka and soaked up the rays on Palolem Beach in Goa.

We stayed in a bamboo shack with paper-thin 塀で囲むs.

Sarfraz (pictured) says the biggest argument in their holiday was the 衝突／不一致 between his 願望（する） for safety and Bridget's passion for adventure

There were not many 列／漕ぐ／騒動s. The biggest arguments we had were when Bridget’s 願望（する） for adventure and freedom 衝突／不一致d with my love of 決まりきった仕事 and safety. She’d want to walk 負かす／撃墜する empty alleys while I preferred the busy streets; she would want to 調査する cities at night, but I assumed danger at every corner.

I was someone who was used to travelling in 慰安 and planning ahead, but Bridget opened my 注目する，もくろむs to the thrill of backpacking and spontaneity.

Bridget was 予定 to 飛行機で行く home one night earli er than me. I remember 説 goodbye to her in Delhi where we were staying in a cheap hotel room that had a bucket instead of a にわか雨.

I 行方不明になるd her the moment she said goodbye.

If our Indian holiday was a 実験（する） of our 関係, it was one we passed. Bridget and I returned to Britain 納得させるd of the rightness of our 関係 ― a 信用／信任 that was sadly necessary, given the fact that my family were 深く，強烈に unhappy I had fallen in love with a woman who was neither Pakistani nor イスラム教徒.

Bridget and I married two years later and had two children.

We recently returned to India with Laila and Ezra and revisited Palolem Beach. It felt like a lifetime since we’d been there.

That first holiday in India remains a magical time in our lives, when our love was young and the 未来 an undiscovered country.

SARFRAZ MANZOOR’S memoir Greetings From Bury Park (£8.46, Vintage) is out now. Blinded By The Light, the film adaptation of his 調書をとる／予約する, is 解放（する）d on August 9.