Spare us this Ross sob story

Updated: 15:58 BST, 10 November 2008

There is a slippery （選挙などの）運動をする 進行中で to excuse the obscene broadcast by Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross on 無線で通信する 2 last month.

It's ありふれた to hear マスコミ folk say it was all a fuss about nothing and 'what a shame if it inhibits the BBC's 昇進／宣伝 of edgy entertainment'.

Broadcasting bigwigs anxious to 保存する the status quo, and their cushy 取引，協定s, are furio us that the 会社／団体 is 存在 held to account and? -? worse? -? its 権利 to collect an 年次の licence 料金 of £139.50 from every TV owner is 脅すd.

Sob story: Ross 被告s say he's not 責任がある his gaff

Talking about the BBC bungling its 陳謝 to actor Andrew Sachs, its world 事件／事情／状勢s editor John Simpson said on TV yesterday that the Mail on Sunday, which broke the story, was out to 'destroy' the 会社／団体. A 完全に absurd （人命などを）奪う，主張する which made me wonder how 本気で to take anything said by Simpson.

The former editor of 無線で通信する 4's Today show, 棒 Liddle, 令状s in The Sunday Times: 'In its 現在の incarnation, there is nothing the 会社／団体's 従業員s can do which will not 乱暴／暴力を加える someone somewhere and lead to callings for a 解雇（する）ing, spurred on by the 会社／団体's many tabloid 圧力（をかける） enemies.'

Nothing it can do? Come, come. Calling an MP 'some under-雇うd nonentity o f a 立法議員' is childish. This is like a feral 青年 scolded for 燃やすing 負かす／撃墜する a house, who whines: 'You never like anything I do? -? it's just complain, complain, complain.'

一方／合間, Ross and Brand argue their 事例／患者 to 同情的な 新聞記者／雑誌記者s and fans. Brand confides to The 観察者／傍聴者 that leaving a message on Sachs's answer machine 説 he'd had sex with the Fawlty Towers 星／主役にする's grand-daughter 'was 完全に devoid of malice'.

But he cannot change his 行為／法令／行動する because of it. With breathtaking conceit, Brand 追加するs: 'If you are asking me to inhibit what is spontaneous and good about my 業績／成果, then I can't do that.'

Of course not. He no longer needs the BBC. He's 確信して of making it big in America. Good luck to him.

Ross lets the 独立した・無所属 on Sunday know he told the 生産者 responsible that his lewd, 記録，記録的な／記録するd conversation with Brand 関心ing actor Andrew Sachs, and Sach's grand-daughter, should not be broadcast. Nothing about making sure it wasn't broadcast.

And 'a friend'? -? might it have been Ross himself?? -? tells the paper: 'It is not Ross's fault. There's a golden 支配する across the 産業 that 生産者s are supposed to 保護する talent . . . Guests are not responsible. Ross's 治療 has been grossly 不公平な.'

What a fantastic 始める，決める-up. Paid £6million a year by the BBC, Ross 推定する／予想するs to be 保護するd from what he says by minions 収入 a fraction of that. Since the whole point of his laddish 行為／法令／行動する is to 原因（となる） offence, how would anyone go about the 職業 of 保護するing him from his own foul mouth? If they were successful, he'd be out of a 職業.

For me, 侮辱ing Andrew Sachs and his grand-daughter wasn't the worst thing about the Ross/Brand broadcast. The really creepy, 冷気／寒がらせるing message was that they could say anything they liked. There was no one to stop them.

The audience to which they 控訴，上告d enjoyed them 説 these incredibly 天然のまま, filthy things on the posh BBC, where they was no one with the 当局 to edit the offerings to this 恐ろしい herd.

How can Ross re-appear on TV as if nothing has happened? For that 事柄, how can BBC director-general 示す Thompson continue in his 職業 as if his 当局 were 損なわれていない? Because it's the BBC.

In any 商業の 関心, they'd both be out the door. But the 雇用者s of Ross and Thompson? -? in 影響, you and me? -? have no say in the 事柄. And the 政府's only 利益／興味 is in using BBC cock-ups to てこ入れ／借入資本 better 治療 for itself from its 一時的に chastened serfs at the 会社／団体.

Last week, I was in America, where there is 猛烈な／残忍な 競争 の中で the three mainstream 網状組織s? -? ABC, NBC and CBS? -? 同様に as 近づく-war between TV news outfits such as CNN and Fox.

For Americans who want a quieter life, there is PBS, 基金d by 寄付s from the public and 豊富な 私的な individuals. A brilliant mix, 供給するing 広大な／多数の／重要な entertainment, news and? -? in the 事例／患者 of PBS? -? thoughtful, reflective broadcasting.

Here, broadcasting is 支配するd by empire 建設業者s at the BBC who 支払う／賃金 their 星／主役にするs 塀で囲む Street 銀行業者s' salaries on the 誤った pretence that they could earn the same in 商業の companies, yet can't even get it 権利 first time when they're apologising to a 78-year-old actor whose family they have 侵害する／違反するd.

Don't listen to their pathetic 'it's not fair' bleating on the Ross/Brand 事件／事情／状勢.

Peaches as Zsa Zsa

（頭が）ひょいと動く Geldof's 19-year-old daughter, Peaches, may or may not have called off her marriage after 96 days. Pals say she doesn't fancy 激しく揺する drummer Max Drummey, 24, any more. It's a shame. 'So young and so much in love,' as an Aberdeen landlady trilled while showing my first live-in girlfriend and I around a flat we were about to rent. Many years ago, Daily Mirror writer Donald Zec was 召喚するd by Zsa Zsa Gabor, who 発表するd that she was ecstatically happy with her sixth husband (to date she's had nine). She thought they'd be buried together, although they'd been married for only a month. Good-natured Zec's immortal 支払う／賃金-off line: 'Who said it wouldn't last?'

• Everywhere we turn there are stories about greedy-swine 銀行業者s, noses 深い in the 気圧の谷, bony 手渡すs しっかり掴むing for handouts. HBOS has a 抱擁する fling for its staff in Edinburgh after 存在 saved by the 政府's £37billion 保釈（金）-out.
  
  Banks who say they won't pass on the 1.5 per cent 利益／興味 率 削減（する）? -? 'We're not charities'? -? are 脅すd with 'prescriptive' 対策 by Alistair Darling. Perhaps it will become 違法な to be a 銀行業者.
  
  Those caught knowingly 扱うing other people's money for the 目的s of making a 利益（をあげる） on it will be 起訴するd. Is there a happier prospect than 栄える ous-looking 商売／仕事 types 存在 bundled into 黒人／ボイコット Marias?

Kiss Me, Catherine: Kate Winslet looked strikingly like the lovely Ms Deneuve in her Vanity Fair spread

Enigmatic Deneuve?

Kate Winslet appears 近づく-naked in the aptly 指名するd magazine Vanity Fair. She is made up to look like the 冷静な／正味の, blonde French actress Catherine Deneuve. All to attract publicity before the Oscar 指名／任命s. Wouldn't it be fun if someone 説得するd Ms Deneuve to doll herself up like Kate Winslet in Enigma!

Shopping the Queen Mother is so vulgar, Posh Ed

The BBC presenter Edward 'Posh Ed' Stourton says that during a 私的な 昼食 with the Queen Mother, she said the EU would never work 'with all those Huns, wops and dagos'. Stourton tells us: 'The Nation's Favourite Grandmother was, I thought, in fact, a 恐ろしい old bigot.'

Why has this Nineties story come out now? Because it's in a 調書をとる／予約する Stourton has written? -? It's A PC World? -? and is plugging. I don't 疑問 for a moment the Queen Mother said what he 引用するs her as 説. かもしれない, she said it to shock him or as a joke. Or maybe it was how she 見解（をとる）d Europeans.

Anyway, she's gone now. 'Gawn,' as members of London's shop-keeping fraternity used to say, 'to the Bourne from which no Hollingsworth has every returned.' So what do we think about ex-public schoolboy Stourton's （危険などに）さらす of the late QM? My 見解（をとる） is that it was vulgar of him to use this story to 押し進める his 調書をとる／予約する.
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Isn't it 利益／興味ing how many 調書をとる／予約するs are published by BBC 指名するs? Having the BBC behind you 誘惑するs publishers, of course. It also helps with publicity.

But where do they find the time to 令状 them? The answer is that they more or いっそう少なく do as they please once they climb 船内に the 会社／団体's gravy train.

We 支払う／賃金 them to broadcast to us. They 令状 調書をとる／予約するs to sell to us. It's a rotten 取引，協定 for us, isn't it?

• Neither Prince William nor his 補佐官s 知らせるd 上級の RAF officers that he used ヘリコプターs for 私的な joyrides, 含むing one to an 小島 of Wight stag night and a wedding, at a cost of £86,434. But his superiors took the 非難する when it was made public. Clarence House 公式の／役人s now say the Prince 収容する／認めるs his five sorties were 'naive' and 受託するs his 株 of 責任／義務.
  
  They said at the time that they were proper training flights, part of William's course. Surely the real 関心? -? if there is one? -? isn't the Prince's 妥当でない use of ヘリコプターs but the demeaning way 公式の／役人s have to 嘘（をつく） on his に代わって.

Gordon's no 勝利者

Foreign 長官 David Miliband appears on breakfast TV to 保証する us that the 政府 is 'led decisively by Gordon'. A 事柄 of weeks ago, he was conniving to 取って代わる Brown as leader.

The 広大な／多数の／重要な 経済的な 炉心溶融 has been good for the 総理大臣. We 明らかに love the way he's been 扱うing a 危機 he helped to create. His 投票s are up, the Tories' are 負かす／撃墜する. He even helped to 勝利，勝つ? -? with wife Sarah's help? -? the Glenrothes 補欠選挙.

Some pundits say we should 推定する／予想する an 早期に General 選挙. Spending public money on 手渡す-outs to 銀行業者s, grand 事業／計画（する）s and 税金 削減（する）s is Brown's speciality, but will we really 投票（する） for a man who, によれば one 見積（る） yesterday, has saddled every family in the land with the 同等（の） of a £70,000 second mortgage?

• 長，指導者 of the Defence Staff Sir Jock Stirrup put himself about on the box yesterday, talking with 広大な／多数の／重要な 信用／信任 on our war in Afghanistan before he went to the Cenotaph to honour those who died in necessary 衝突s. I wonder when he decided to give himself the Jilly Cooperish 指名する of Jock Stirrup. His real one seems to be Graham Eric Stirrup. Neither Graham nor Eric? -? 特に Eric? -? sounds as 信頼できる as Jock, do they?