Ben was 14 when he was ゆすり，恐喝d online into sending explicit pictures. He tried to take his own life. But, unlike some other 犠牲者s of 'sextortion', he 生き残るd to tell a story every parent should read
Ben Wilde* was a popular and academic 14-year-old when he received a chatty Facebook message from a girl he'd never met, who （人命などを）奪う，主張するd she was friends with someone on his school football team.
The pair ended up corresponding online about what Ben calls 'all the normal stuff'; family, school, friends.
Nothing seemed remotely out of the ordinary ― until a few weeks later, when the 'girl' 明らかにする／漏らすd she was, in fact, a grown man. Now 武装した with reams of personal （警察などへの）密告，告訴（状）, he made 脅しs against Ben's family unless he sent him a 一連の naked photos.
Terrified and 攻撃を受けやすい, Ben 従うd, only to find the blackmailer upping his 需要・要求するs, asking for the 十代の少年少女 to appear in sexually 妥協ing 提起する／ポーズをとるs on Skype before sending the ビデオs and pictures to other men ― who in turn 砲撃するd Ben with more requests.
'Gifted' student Dinal De Alwis took his own life after 存在 ゆすり，恐喝d with nude photos by a stranger on social マスコミ app Snapchat
The blackmailer told Ben that if he didn't continue, he would send all the ビデオs to Ben's friends and tell them he was gay.
This 広げるing horror went on for two years until, believing he'd never find a way out of this nightmare, Ben took an overdose in his bedroom one afternoon after school at the age of just 16. 'I didn't know who to tell or what to do. I'd got myself in too 深い and I was so embarrassed. All I thought all the time was: 'When will this be over?' he 解任するs. 'I decided to try and end my life, so I didn't have to を取り引きする what was happening.'
Thankfully, his mother （機の）カム into the room and, on seeing the empty tablet boxes, 急ぐd her son to hospital.
Now 老年の 22, Ben can still vividly 解任する the panic and shame he felt on discovering he was a 犠牲者 of 'sextortion', the 指名する given to a 現象 in which ruthless 犯罪の ギャング（団）s ― often from West Africa and South-East Asia ― 的 young people online.
They 誘惑する them into an online 'friendship' 経由で 偽の or 切り開く／タクシー／不正アクセスd social マスコミ accounts and 説得する them to 株 intimate photographs or （映画の）フィート数.
They then 明らかにする／漏らす their true 身元 and 脅す to 解放（する） the images to loved ones unless the 犠牲者 either continues to service their requests or sends money.
Sextortion is not a new 現象, but it is one that is rising exponentially, with the number of children 的d in the UK ロケット／急騰するing almost threefold in 最近の years.
Murray Dowey took his own life 老年の 16 in December last year after becoming 犠牲者 to sextortion by a man 提起する／ポーズをとるing as a teenage girl online
Ros and 示す Dowey's lives were torn apart when they lost their beloved son. 'We were six feet away when this was happening,' Ros says. 'He just needed to come through to our bedroom'
This year, the 国家の 罪，犯罪 機関 明らかにする／漏らすd that the number of 事例／患者s of child 性の 開発／利用 報告（する）／憶測d by under-18s had risen from 243 in 2020 to 890 in 2022.
The spike has been almost 排他的に driven by sextortion 事例／患者s, with one of the most 的d groups 存在 teenage boys 老年の from 14 to 18. Tragically, in 最近の years, at least three are known to have taken their own life after 落ちるing 犠牲者 to ruthless online predators.
Such is the 開始するing level of 危険 that the 国家の 罪，犯罪 機関 this week took the 前例のない step of 問題／発行するing an 警報 to school teachers across Britain ― at both 最初の／主要な and 第２位 level ― to be on guard for children 存在 的d by '極端に malicious' 犯罪のs who leave a 破滅的な 遺産／遺物.
'It's 影響する／感情d us terribly as a family,' Ben's father told the Mail.
'I'm 絶えず thinking about it, and what he did. You feel like you 港／避難所't done enough to 保護する your children, who are the world to you. You ask yourselves: "Why didn't we see it? Why didn't we notice?" There is always that "why?"'?
In the US, where more than a dozen boys have taken their own lives after 存在 ゆすり，恐喝d over intimate images, the 現象 has been 述べるd by the 連邦検察局's director Christopher Wray as nothing いっそう少なく than a '全世界の 危機' that '需要・要求するs everyone's attention'.
Ben is in no 疑問 about that 感情. One of two brothers, he went from 存在 a happy-go-lucky member of a loving family to panic-stricken and suicidal.
After his torme ntor 明かすd himself and began 脅すing to 株 the personal nature of their conversations to Ben's friends on Snapchat, he 抽出するd endless 妥協ing photographs and （映画の）フィート数 from the 十代の少年少女, subsequently sending it to other men who also started sending their own 需要・要求するs.
'With the bigger 需要・要求するs （機の）カム bigger 脅しs,' says Ben, who says the messages left him in a 明言する／公表する of abject terror.
At one point, the 犯人 told Ben he knew where his parents worked and would go there and kill them.
'The words he used were: "I'll destroy you",' Ben 解任するs. 'I was so embarrassed, so just carried on, hoping one day it would just finish without me ever having to tell anyone. I just thought he'd disappear once I'd done enough for him.'
All the while, his parents Carl and Rachel* were oblivious to the fact that one of their two 'lovely' sons was in the 支配する of such 外傷／ショック.
Ben didn't even own a smartphone, and had only been given a laptop at the age of 13 to do his schoolwork.
'We just let Ben get on with it,' Carl 解任するs today. 'We had no idea that there was anything to worry about or that there were dangers of any 肉親，親類d. We thought he was using it for schoolwork.'
Only after Ben had 試みる／企てるd to take his own life ― に引き続いて which several of the images were 設立する on his laptop ― did Carl and Rachel get called to a police 駅／配置する to be told the horrifying news that their son had been 'groomed'.
'Our lives changed for ever,' Carl says 簡単に. 'We 非難するd ourselves and we thought we'd failed.
'We used to love life and go out all the time. But after this we just 手配中の，お尋ね者 to be 近づく the kids in 事例／患者 something happened.
'Ben tried to get out of the 状況／情勢 so many times but he couldn't. He just fe lt helpless and didn't know what to do. He was 罠にかける, and too 脅すd to tell anyone.'
Happily, Ben 生き残るd his 試みる／企てる to take his own life. But in Dunblane, Ros and 示す Dowey are grieving the loss of their 16-year-old son Murray after he, too, was 的d by sextortion 犯罪のs, and took his own life last December.
Nothing had seemed amiss when the sociable, guitar-playing, football-loving Murray ― known affectionately as 'Muzz' ― had retired to his bedroom at the family home around 9.30 in the evening after chatting animatedly about his 計画（する）s to take a holiday to Marbella this summer.
The に引き続いて morning, Ros spotted her son's door ajar with the light on. 'I walked in and said: "Are you up?" and 設立する him there,' she 解任するd in an emotional interview with the 後見人 earlier this week.
She and her husband 示す were subsequently told by Police Scotland that 証拠 on their son's phone 示唆するd that on the night he died, Murray ― who his parents say had never shown any 問題／発行するs with his mental health ― had been 的d by 犯罪のs 伴う／関わるd in financially-動機づけるd 性の ゆすり，強要. All the while, in ありふれた with other families, his parents remained oblivious.
'We'd had lots of conversations with our boys about online safety [and] social マスコミ... you never, ever imagine it's going to 攻撃する，衝突する you because you're just a "normal family" and these things don't happen,' says his father.
'We were six feet away when this was happening,' Ros 追加するs. 'He just needed to come through to our bedroom.
'So it's about putting the phone 負かす／撃墜する, walking away, 説 to someone else: "This has happened ? what the hell do I do?"
'Murray didn't do that, and we lost him. To think of my little boy in such 苦しめる and not to reach out for help, it's awful.'
Police Scotland is now working with 当局 in Nigeria to find the 悪党／犯人 responsible.
Tragically, Murray is not the only teenage boy to have taken his life under such circumstances in 最近の years.
Dinal De Alwis, 16, from Sutton, was a 'gentle' and 'gifted' straight?A scholarship student at 主要な boys' school Whitgift who, just a few hours after 株ing an ordinary family dinner in October 2022, left home, 記録，記録的な／記録するd a final goodbye message to his family and took his own life.
Dinal, one of three brothers and 述べるd as a 'golden boy' by his father Kaushallya, had just returned from a family holiday to Mallorca, and his family had 'no idea' anything was wrong. A police 調査 subsequently 設立する that at 1am on the day he died, Dinal had been sent two naked photos of himself on Snapchat by a blackmailer who 脅すd to 解放（する） the images if he did not send him £100.
South London 検死官's 法廷，裁判所 heard that the blackmailer wrote: 'So you think 封鎖するing me can stop me? What do you want me to do ― you want me to send to all of your 信奉者s? Why can't you just 支払う／賃金 me? £100?'
Dinal 答える／応じるd that he had assumed the pictures had already been 分配するd. He slipped out of the house at 2am and 記録，記録的な／記録するd a 簡潔な／要約する ビデオ of himself walking 負かす／撃墜する a 郊外の street. His 団体／死体 was 設立する an hour later. 'His loss is the biggest possible loss,' his father 解任するd. 'It is so incredibly painful. The fact he ended his life this way... the world is so cruel.'
Seven years earlier, 17-year-old grammar school pupil Ronan Hughes, from the 田舎の town of Coalisland in 郡 Tyrone, also took his own life after 存在 tricked into 株ing intimate photographs of himself by someone 提起する／ポーズをとるing as a girl online.
That person then 脅すd to send the images to his friends if the schoolboy did not 支払う／賃金 a 身代金 of £2,500.
にもかかわらず pleading with his tormentor, 'I'm only 17 years old, please, I beg', the photos were sent to five of his friends. Hours after some of them were 株d online, Ronan took his own life.
A man called Iulian Enache from Romania was later 宣告，判決d to four years in 刑務所，拘置所 after a specialist cyber-罪，犯罪 部隊 traced the computer he had used to ゆすり，恐喝 the 十代の少年少女.
All too often, however, it is almost impossible for 探偵，刑事s to unravel the 広大な 犯罪の web behind 行為／法令／行動するs of sextortion.
At Dinal's 検死, Met Police 明らかにする／漏らすd the schoolboy's tormentor was likely using a 事実上の 私的な 網状組織 to mask his 場所 but was probably based in Nigeria, part of a sprawling 網状組織 of 犯罪の ギャング（団）s operating from West Africa who send 'thousands' of 偽の friend requests from 偽の or 切り開く／タクシー／不正アクセスd 女性（の） accounts to 西部の人／西洋人s.
'They cast their 逮捕する wide,' says Susie Hargreaves, CEO of the charity Internet Watch 創立／基礎, whose remit is to minimise the availability of online 性の 乱用 content. Her organisation has also seen an eight-倍の 増加する in 報告（する）／憶測d child sextortion 事例／患者s, with 176 last year compared to 21 the previous year. Sixty per cent of them 伴う／関わるd 16 and 17-year-old boys.
'It's organised 罪，犯罪, except the 悪党／犯人 isn't in the room any more ― they are behind the computer,' Susie told the Mail.
'We continue to be very 関心d about internet safety. Parents think they are 安全な because their children are in the house.' She is struck by the 'enormous panic' experienced by 犠牲者s, who don't have the life experience to see a way out of something they 非難する themselves for becoming embroiled in. 'The panic they feel is 抱擁する,' she says. 'The shame, the feeling that they're responsible because they 株d the picture in the first place.'
同様に as calling on tech 巨大（な）s to take more 責任／義務 for content, her charity has, together with the NSPCC, developed a 道具 called 報告（する）／憶測 除去する to 除去する online images and ビデオs of 乱用. 'Twelve years ago when I first arrived we 除去するd 9,000 web pages, last year 2.75 million,' says Susie. 'Ninety-two per cent of that is self-生成するd content.'
It is an important piece of armour in the 戦う／戦い against abusers. But, as Hargreaves points out, while organisations are 武装した with better 科学（工学）技術 to 除去する troublesome content from the internet , that same 科学（工学）技術 also helps the 犯罪のs. 'いつかs it can feel like whack-a-mole' she confides. 'But every image 除去するd is one いっそう少なく piece of 乱用.'
Richard Collard, associate 長，率いる of child safety online 政策 at the NSPCC, whose Childline is frequently 接触するd by '極端に' 苦しめるd child 犠牲者s of sextortion, also called for tech 壇・綱領・公約s to step up.
'The 重荷（を負わせる） should not be on children to 保護する themselves from 害（を与える） online,' he says. 'Tech companies must step up and 活発に 取り組む the 脅し of 性の ゆすり，強要 on their 壇・綱領・公約s by putting 保護（する）／緊急輸入制限s in place and identifying dangerous behaviour.'
Moreover, that watchfulness should 適用する to everyone says Iain Critchley, 長，率いる of child 保護 on the 国家の Police 長，指導者s 会議, who points out that の中で young people some 面s of 株ing 性の content has become 'normalised', making it easier to 誘惑する children in.
'We must all ― parents, schools, police ― have 雑談（する）s with young people around the 危険s 伴う／関わるd in 株ing nude images,' he says.
'As a dad of three I know that having those 会談 with your kids can be embarrassing, but it is too late once they have lost 支配（する）／統制する of that image.'
Ben knows he is one of the 'lucky' ones. Not only did he 生き残る his 試みる／企てる to take his own life, but his British 悪党／犯人 ― who is understood to have been working with around six other men ― was traced and 刑務所，拘置所d for four and a half years.
Nonetheless, the 遺産／遺物 of what happens remains 深遠な. Ben 戦う／戦いs 苦悩 と一緒に 現在進行中の 犯罪 for what he perceives as the 外傷／ショック he 原因（となる）d his parents.
'We're the best family ever, but I feel like I let them 負かす／撃墜する,' he says. 'It still 影響する／感情s Mum and Dad and I get really upset about that. We won't ever be able to forget what he's done t o us.'
* 指名するs have been changed.
- ?For support call the Samaritans on 116 123 or visit samaritans.org
